Just so as I get this correct; You have been riding 9 months,
last summer you were putting 120-150 miles a week,
you went to the indoor trainer for about 20 a week,!!!
And you go on your first ride of the year and expect to kill it?
REALLY**********?
Hmmm.....
Get out there and ride your bike! The indoor trainer is NOT the same!
You will improve your overall fitness quicker this year than you did last year.
BUT!!!
You need to lower your expectations, at least this early in the season!
9 months is not enough time in the saddle to know your fitness levels!