Originally Posted by
Myosmith
All I'm going to say is that you have thrown up some real red flags. Get to your doctor and tell him/her EVERYTHING, don't sugar coat it. If you ever feel that you are in danger of harming yourself or anyone else, please, please call 911. Good luck and I hope you get the help you need.
+1. No one will win if the steak knife "finds it's way" into your wife. This is a cry for help that should be made to a professional, not strangers on the Internet.