I understand your emotions, Mithrandir. I was shocked when I saw a side-shot of me that was taken by a friend of mine at the TdC this year - it clearly showed a belly where I thought there wasn't one any longer.
Self image is a tough nut to crack. It always seems to work against us, whether it's not looking as good as we think we do, or thinking we look worse than we do. All I can tell you is you're waaaaaaay ahead of most of the population in getting out there to improve yourself, and have fun to boot. Take a look at your accomplishments and take justifiable pride in what you've done so far. Then use them as fuel to energize your continued efforts.