i take ample time every week to pursue activities that keep mentally and physically healthy. I too have had some growing pains with my spouse over our own time. partners are different and sometimes they might not realize that what they consider essential for them is not the same for the other. My wife needs to spend many hours per week talking to her sister, mother, meet with girlfriends and talk things out. That is totally essential to her so that when she gets home to me she is mentally happy. Without these 'sessions' she wouldn't be wanting to do bike rides, hiking or camping with me. Those 'sessions' are essential for her.
Not for me. I need much less time for needing to 'vent' and 'talking it out' - but I need more physical time. I need to be outside and participate in physical activity.
We tallied how much time each needs to spend on those activities and then each of us used that time separately for 'me' time. The rest of our time is OUR time and everything seems to work 'reasonably' well :-)