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Whatever happened to “You’re Welcome?”

Old 01-14-19, 08:54 PM
  #1  
eja_ bottecchia
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Whatever happened to “You’re Welcome?”

The other night my wife and I went dining at a very nice, local restaurant. The service was very good, no complaints there.

But every time that we thanked our waitress for somthing that she did, like bringing us water, or extra bread, she would invariably respond, “Of course.”

After a while it became a tad annoying, so we stopped thanking her.

Then today I went to the supermarket and when I thanked the boxboy he responded, yes you guessed it ...”of course.”

what is wrong with people, since when did “of course” become an acceptable substitute for “yo are welcome.”

Next time someone tells me “of course,” I will just respond, “of course WHAT?”

Is it just me or is everyone else as annoyed as I am by this new “development?”





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Old 01-14-19, 09:42 PM
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I hate it when people reply with "uh huh"

THAT's annoying.
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Old 01-14-19, 09:45 PM
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No problem.
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Old 01-14-19, 09:53 PM
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Originally Posted by wgscott View Post
No problem.
de nada
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Old 01-14-19, 09:57 PM
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Another thing I hate:

When you offer someone something, and they reply "I'm Good" instead of "No, thank you."

Then there are those particularly heinous people who want to "reach out" to you.
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Old 01-14-19, 10:15 PM
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Old 01-14-19, 10:28 PM
  #7  
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Originally Posted by Marcus_Ti View Post
de nada
In French it’s “de rien” which sort means the same, “it’s nothing.”

There is something about the “of course” reply that is just grating. It is as if when you thank the person and they reply “of course,” there is a notion that they are entitled to the thank you.

“Thank you for bagging my groceries.”

”Of course...you had better thank me.”

Maybe I am just getting old and these new uses of the language just don’t sound right.
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Old 01-14-19, 11:38 PM
  #8  
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Originally Posted by eja_ bottecchia View Post
It is as if when you thank the person and they reply “of course,” there is a notion that they are entitled to the thank you.
What's the difference between being entitled to something and being welcome to something?
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Old 01-15-19, 03:25 AM
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a pleasant smile and nod, my pleasure or even of course (which i would take as 'of course you're welcome'), works fine for me….but then I’m not hard to please..



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Old 01-15-19, 08:13 AM
  #10  
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
What's the difference between being entitled to something and being welcome to something?

I don’t know, you tell me.
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Old 01-15-19, 08:49 AM
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My interpretation of the utterance of the phrase "Of course" in response to "Thank you":

"My respect for you [as a customer in my place of employment] is such that my courteous service is provided as a matter of course."

"Of course," offered repeatedly over the course of a meal, might get on my nerves a bit, but only because I'm not used to hearing it in that context.
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Old 01-15-19, 08:59 AM
  #12  
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Boy, I bet when the OP holds the door open for someone and they don't say anything, man... the tension. I can state with genuine sincerity that I've never in my life been upset because someone responded to a "Thank You" without a "You're Welcome."

The inexcusable is when you wave someone ahead at a four-way stop and they proceed without any recognition at all. THE AUDACITY. IT'S CIVILIZATION IN DECLINE!
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Old 01-15-19, 09:20 AM
  #13  
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"Of course" wouldn't bother me. It conveys the same message as de nada and de rien. Just a shorthand way of saying "It's my job and a pleasure to serve you, as long as you're not a hand-biting monster."

Some cultures are wary of effusive praise, thanks, etc. I suspect that over time as the US becomes more diverse and incorporates more cultures, some areas will see more usage of casual idiomatic expressions that reflect those influences.
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Old 01-15-19, 09:35 AM
  #14  
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Originally Posted by wgscott View Post
No problem.
I picked up a wonderful mindset 20-something years ago from some business self-help guru whose presentation I just happened to be the audio engineer for. His comment -- which I immediately took to heart and have embraced ever since -- was simply never say "no problem"

Not (just) because "you're welcome" would be more polite, but rather because "no problem" implies that whatever it was you did that earned thanks didn't require any effort, work, conscious awareness... and when you do something for someone else -- especially in a business transaction -- that's the last thing you want to convey. You instead want to convey that you did that something for someone else specifically through your own effort, work, conscious awareness; that it may in fact even have been a "problem" [sic] but you did it anyway because you recognized how it would benefit the other guy. And when he thanks you for that effort, that's him acknowledging your hard work. Don't dismiss their gratitude/recognition...because then the next time they'll expect that from you.
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Old 01-15-19, 09:48 AM
  #15  
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"Sure thing"

"You betcha"

A lot of times when somebody (over)thanks me for something I don't think they should be surprised that I would do, I say "glad to do it", or "happy to help", or "hey, it's my job"

A similar thing, how do you respond to "Sorry" -- It bugs me (only a tiny bit) the response "it's ok". If it was truly OK, then "sorry" shouldn't have been necessary. "apology accepted" or "I forgive you" is usually over the top -- what's the right middle ground to acknowledge the sorry was necessary and appreciated?
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Old 01-15-19, 09:51 AM
  #16  
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Originally Posted by RubeRad View Post
A similar thing, how do you respond to "Sorry" -- It bugs me (only a tiny bit) the response "it's ok". If it was truly OK, then "sorry" shouldn't have been necessary. "apology accepted" or "I forgive you" is usually over the top -- what's the right middle ground to acknowledge the sorry was necessary and appreciated?
I will usually say "thanks"
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Old 01-15-19, 09:59 AM
  #17  
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Hmmm... I'm quick to say "thanks" for receiving something.

Perhaps even saying "thanks" for someone handing the bill to me.

There comes a point where both the customer and the business wish to thank a person for something.
Customer... Thanks for product
Business... Thanks for paying for service.
The "You're Welcome" gets left out.

Originally Posted by wgscott View Post
No problem.
I don't use it much, but I've been amazed at how the Australian phrase, "No Worries" has spread across the USA in the last decade or two.

Can I add an "O" to the end of that? "No Problemo"?
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Old 01-15-19, 10:53 AM
  #18  
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Originally Posted by DrIsotope View Post
Boy, I bet when the OP holds the door open for someone and they don't say anything, man... the tension. I can state with genuine sincerity that I've never in my life been upset because someone responded to a "Thank You" without a "You're Welcome."

The inexcusable is when you wave someone ahead at a four-way stop and they proceed without any recognition at all. THE AUDACITY. IT'S CIVILIZATION IN DECLINE!
This. Also keep in mind most are not thinking about the meaning, just habitually responding based on social norms they picked up (for better or worse). I also suspect those in service industry adapt different responses as 'your welcome' starts to feel cliche or otherwise overused.
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Old 01-15-19, 11:35 AM
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It's you. Conventions change over time. Instead of accepting "Of course" as the new "You're welcome" you plan to offer a sarcastic response. That puts you below the sincere people you are complaining about.
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Old 01-15-19, 01:59 PM
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Old 01-15-19, 02:46 PM
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Originally Posted by eja_ bottecchia View Post



I don’t know, you tell me.
To me, there really isn't much of a difference between being welcome or entitled to something. Whether it's a good or service. And in a commercial context, I don't think it's a bad thing to feel entitled to what you paid for.
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Old 01-15-19, 04:08 PM
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"No problem" annoys me because it seems to imply that what the person did would normally have been a problem. But I have to take it in the spirit it was intended in, and I really need to calm down about it. It is intended well, as an equivalent to "you are welcome" so I don't make an issue of it.

Language changes, and we have to face that fact. Some of the change is hard to accept, but that's life.
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Old 01-15-19, 04:12 PM
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I say 'You're Welcome' because that's what I was taught growing up.
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Old 01-15-19, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by roadfix View Post
I say 'You're Welcome' because that's what I was taught growing up.
When I was young, people were taught good manners. I think now some people don't even know what the words mean. I don't hear anyone talking about being polite either. I taught it to my kids, and tried to be a good example. Somehow they survived anyway.
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Old 01-15-19, 09:04 PM
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Originally Posted by eja_ bottecchia View Post
The other night my wife and I went dining at a very nice, local restaurant. The service was very good, no complaints there.

But every time that we thanked our waitress for somthing that she did, like bringing us water, or extra bread, she would invariably respond, “Of course.”

After a while it became a tad annoying, so we stopped thanking her.

Then today I went to the supermarket and when I thanked the boxboy he responded, yes you guessed it ...”of course.”

what is wrong with people, since when did “of course” become an acceptable substitute for “yo are welcome.”

Next time someone tells me “of course,” I will just respond, “of course WHAT?”

Is it just me or is everyone else as annoyed as I am by this new “development?”


You are someone who prides themselves on being a non-waver.


You have no credibility to be complaining here.
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