nasty

so in my better paid job, i'm a messenger agony aunt.

buyt this ones got me stumped... not really, but i wanna plagarise something offa you guys.

Dear Aunty Nasty
I have a problem, my EX is a vegan. Every time i tuck into a tasty
bacon sandwich, or Pigs heart salad, all i can think of is her eyes
staring at me as if i were satan. what shall i do? am i destined to
become a vegan too? i dont think i'd have enough energy to ride my
bike if i was. help me please!

so i know this guy. he rocks. his ex on the other hand doesnt. now i've got nuthing agianst vegans - my ex fiance was one before she started sleeping around on me, but whatever...

help my boy out here people!

y'all get a headsup on www.movingtargetzine.com

take care, ride safe, etc

shants

the fact that he's still living with his ex (or spending a lot of time around her) is probably the first thing that he needs to remedy.

delay

I don't get it.

dolface

what shants said, and also, as soon as he starts sleeping with someone else he'll get over it.

in the meantime, start small, sausage or pepperoni on his pizza, some bacon crumbled into the scrambled eggs, just like training for a race.

(and i'm vegan if it makes aany difference).

eddiebrannan

who gives a **** what she thinks. ex means ex

get over it

SyntaxPC

It took me so many re-reads to figure out what the **** you are trying to ask that I don't think I have enough energy to ride my bike now.

If this is really a problem for him, which could be serious, perhaps he should entrust it to a more creditable body than an online fixed gear forum.

eddiebrannan

and if he's eating pig's heart salads he needs to get over that gross disgusting **** too

humancongereel

hey, hearts are good. very strong muscle = good meaty meat.

dolface

eating organs is gross

humancongereel

meh, to each his own. my dad raised me with a fairly adventurous palate.

dolface

my parents did too, but organs never worked for me.
my brother on the other hand...

humancongereel

heh. this is one thing my dad created (he's always experimenting in the kitchen. it rubbed off on me, totally): red cabbage, red onions, cinnamon, apples, and raisins, all stewed together. most disgusting slop i've ever tasted. now THAT'S nasty.

to me, organs are just a dead animal i'm eating, the same as a thigh or wing or steak.

anyway, this dude in the letter should eat what he wants and stop worrying about his ex. obviously he still gives a **** about her for whatever reason, so that needs to be remedied before he can stop worrying. so i second dolface, he should sleep with someone else, or at least start talking to other girls and getting numbers and ****. find a new pretty, fixie riding gal to fall head over heels for, you know?

shants

slay 'tang.

dolface

your tags are reversed

humancongereel

ha ha ha....reminds me...i have some breakfast sausage in the fridge. mmmm....

SirrusPackage

SirrusPackage

And organ meat is delicious. Chicken liver omelettes are just one prime example.

nasty

ok people, for those of you that dont get this post... ma boys ex just KEEPS on bugging him... she rung him up mebbe 30 tmes the other day, loads of emails etc... he wants no part of it... he's a dedicated carnivore that had to go to the dark side of veganism whilst he was dating her... he wants some advice as to how to put her off i guess. thanks so much for all your commetns so far, but i need more - ya aunty nasty needs more... and i'm not talking about stapling strips of bacon to ya pumas... (that is a bristish thing - our rashers of bacon look more like the puma thing than your very odd us rashers, HOWEVER uastraqlian bacon sucks. tastes waaay too piggy) if you aint getting it, then check out www.movingtargetzine.com. i do the agony aunt column. it aint rocket science

humancongereel

i'm partial to hearts. liver's not bad either, and i have some chicken gizzards in the freezer i need to cook up sometime.

EDIT: i also am looking for haggis in the portland area.

humancongereel

hmmm, so he just wants her to shut up and quit bugging him? has he said so yet? to her, i mean.

dolface

don't answer calls from her, create a filter that sends her email to the trash, and tell her he's gonna get a restraining order if she doesn't stop stalking her.

and then send her a pound of raw bacon in the mail.

nasty

ok, hows this?

get an asbo on her

turn up at her house at 3am next tuesday morning, high on rock, naked and smothered in beef dripping, with back bacon rashers stapled to his feet (pumas) and an aviator helmet made out of steak. and then ask to get reaquainted with her. in the biblical sense.

tell her that she never really had a trust fund (she gotta pay everything back) and that 8her 0's chromed carlton track bike is really a pista with the decals ripped off...

you people think that might just put her off?

eddiebrannan

he needs to be eating some fresh organs, namean?

nasty

sorry, for you north americans...

asbo - anti social behaviour order

i have two at the moment. i cant go within 1/2 mile of my next door neighbour because he threatened my housemate, the other i cant divulge on this forum

humancongereel

well, that's the idea, isn't it?

edit: in regard to putting her off.