thintoast

PTSD is most commonly associated with veterans and the like, however the very definition of PTSD is simply the stress on experiences after encountering a traumatic event. Whether it's watching someone die on the battlefield, sliding and rolling on the freeway after dropping your motorcycle because some 18 year old girl decided it would be a good idea to change lanes from a lane that was dead stop to the next lane that was moving at about 40 mph, a car coming out of a driveway right inf ront of your bicycle or your neighbor friend jumping off a roof and breaking his leg. If something happens that makes you fear an activity, sound, smell, taste... whatever that you didn't fear before, that's PTSD. There are different levels of PTSD, some are far more severe than others, but to say only veterans can have PTSD is simply not true and quite frankly diluting the fact that it is a serious condition.

There. Now that that's out of the way...

I've been in a motorcycle accident (in case you couldn't tell by the first half of my response) where I was cut off and essentially thrown from my bike. Now, I have loud pipes that when revved up, will wake the dead. Even something that obvious, on a big and heavy machine with a headlight on it didn't stop her from changing lanes right in front of me. After going down, I was in shock. My brain couldn't even comprehend what had happened. The next day I felt all of it, and it was not good. Thanks to the safety gear I was wearing I had no major injuries and was able to walk away from it, but it still shuttered me. A week later I went out and bought a new motorcycle, got back on and started riding again. Why? Because I knew that as scared as I was, I didn't want to let that one instance after 20,000 miles scare me into never doing something that I used to enjoy. Instead of fearing the motorcycle, I embraced the experience. What happened? What was I doing? Why didn't she see me? What could I have done differently? I analyzed the experience and learned all of the things that were done wrong, both on her part and my own, and learned to practice them everyday. I've learned that I will never know how to ride a motorcycle, but rather everyday I learn how to ride a little better.

That's how I got over something similar.

Depending on how your experience affected you, that may or may not work for you. Either way, no judgment should come from anyone about your fear and worries. It's a legitimate worry.

jeichelberg87

I had my first one this year also...I was riding to a club ride in South Bend and was struck from behind by a guy driving a 3/4 ton passenger van. He was doing 55 and the passenger side mirror struck my left shoulder blade. Loudest noise I heard in my life. Did not knock me down. I stopped and got off the road by a tree. He kept going a little and then turned around and came back. He pulled along the shoulder on the opposite side of the road and asked me if I was okay. I said, "Yeah, why did you hit me?" He said, "I didn't see you." I said, "Come closer and I will test your eyesight..."

After the police report and EMT check were all complete, I had choices. Do I call my dad and have him drive twenty miles to get me? Do I walk the bike home ten miles? Do I ride the bike home ten miles? Do I finish what I started, ride to the club ride and put the incident behind me?

Life is full of choices, which is a good thing. I chose the last. 4000 miles later, I have had more close calls, but no more crashes. But I have had a helluva lot of fun, more than I would have had giving up.

But it is your choice.

Retro Grouch 

If you haven't been there I think that it's hard to understand the feeling.

Six or seven years ago I was having a relaxing ride with my (then) nine year old grandson. We had a crash that resulted in my breaking both of my elbows. "Get back on your bike and ride it. Period" wasn't going to happen. Even the first psychologist who I visited talked about the "Big Bad Wolf." She, obviously just didn't get it either. I remember making several trips down to the Katy Trail with Mrs. Grouch, getting prepared to ride, and just not being mentally capable of riding. My best intentions and my best efforts simply weren't enough to get me over the hump. That's a first person experience.

Like I said, it's been six or seven years now and I'm pretty much over it. Pretty much isn't completely. I've had several setbacks during the recovery process and I'm clearly more accident prone than I was prior to the accident. I took up riding a recumbent trike this summer after I got tired of counting any ride that didn't involve some kind of a fall as a successful outing. I realize that many other riders experiences don't mirror mine. That, however, doesn't make my experience any less valid.

To say: "Just get back on your bike and ride it. Period." is, I think, a response by a person who has no idea what he is talking about.

SkunkWerX

YOU were injured. The OP was not. He was mentally shaken, yes. There is a BIG difference.

I have had various crashes on dirt bikes, ATVs, Mtn Bikes, and on the road.
I have experience with this as well. I actually understand the hesitation. I have had the hesitation myself.
AND, that is why I am saying without an injury, get back on and ride.

10 Wheels

Get out of the hospital before you think about crashing again.

SkunkWerX

Injuries give us time to think and reflect.
The choice of whether to start riding again, or not, is not available, it has been made for us.

Thankfully, in the case of this OP, there was no injury to him or his bike.
That is a huge sigh of relief.

SkunkWerX

Once again, "injury" or no injury.

My daughter has had 3 concussions in her life (ice skater), I KNOW way too much about brain injuries to even start that discussion.

This OP has said, to all of us, he is NOT injured. I am not going to play doctor and say "well he could have hit his head". The information we have, is that he is uninjured. My position on this remains unchanged.

I'm done here after being personally attacked, above. Later guys.

Maelochs

People, if we work at it hard enough we can Always find something to fight over.

Okay, so "get back on the horse" is not Universally great advice ... but it seems to be Generally good advice.

There is no "Universally" Good Advice.

Every situation is unique.

However, if we had to personally explore every single situation before giving advice ... then the accumulated wisdom of all of us would be worthless.

When I give advice, I assume the person I am counseling is smart enough not to do something which won't work for that individual ... sort of like when people advise me about training methods, without asking about my injuries or my heart condition ... I assume they are telling me the best they know, and figure I am smart enough to modify it as needed to suit my specific situation.

In any case, if someone gives well-meaning and generally useful advice, there is no cause for the few people to whom it doesn't apply, to get angry about it.

Eye on the ball folks ... the point of this thread is Helping This Guy Get Back on His Bike. That is what the OP wants.

The thread is not about us validating our own ideas or opinions, not about attacking others with differing views,.. it is about helping the OP.

Retro Grouch 

I'm a mechanic. I'm pretty good with things that have chains and sprockets. Electronics - not so much.

It's relatively easy to understand and to repair broken bones. Given enough time and inclination, I believe that I could learn to do that. How our brains function, however, is a mystery to me. If I were to cut open some diode or some such lump on a printed circuit board all that I would see would be a lump of crystal of some kind. It doesn't look to me like it could do anything. That doesn't mean that it has no function and that doesn't mean that it might not be broken or injured in some way. It only means that I'm ignorant of that particular topic.

For me to claim that I could fix whatever was wrong by sticking in something that looked like whatever it was that I cut apart - that would be the act of a buffoon.

wphamilton

I don't know what's up with that. For my part, I've been through enough to know something about it, probably you to. OP isn't looking for a psychoanalysis here. Evaluate the goals and if he wants to bike again, get back on the bike, period. If there is some challenge with that, go on to the next step.

bikecrate

For what it's worth to the OP I'll talk about my own experience. I had something similar happen. Bike destroyed but I got away with some cuts. I was on vacation so it was the only bike I had with me. It annoyed me that I could not get back on a bike and ride immediately. As soon as I got home I took my other bike out. Sure, I was a little nervous. It felt like every car was turning at me or passing too close, but I believed that the sooner I got back riding the quicker I could put it behind me. It took a few more rides to settle down a bit. I don't know about PTSD, but I did have a few flashbacks immediately after the crash that bothered me. However, it's been a couple of years since then and I hardly think about it now. The main thing I did was buy a quality set of lights and set them on strobe for daytime riding.

PhotoJoe 

MOD NOTE: The OP's question was:

Feel free to carry on the PTSD conversation in a dedicated thread, if you so choose. This isn't the place. And let's not make this personal, shall we?

IK_biker

//snip

I beg to differ on this.
Thinking that there was nothing you could have really done is plain wrong. This sort of mentality is to be fought and overcome.

Perhaps next time you'd see the threat earlier. Or you'd start braking earlier instead of wasting time for yelping. Or maybe execute an evasive maneuver. Or perhaps you'd brake better - at the point of controlled rear tire liftoff, which is very safe on dry non-sandy roads, and is the fastest way to stop.
Besides the passive preparation (bright clothing, lights, loudspeakers blasting Wagner's @ 120 dB, etc.) the things I listed are all achievable as long as you recognize that in fact you could do better, and train yourself to do so.

Maelochs

Glad you brought this up. My first thought upon reading this, was exactly yours, but I wanted the OP to get a few positive responses first ...

The first thing to learn from this incident is defensive riding. I mentioned it obliquely, as did a few others ... but not only will you likely make the samee mistakes if you don’t acknowledge them, even worse you will feel helpless.

I doubt I would have had the collision (just assuming ... ) because if I saw a car coming out of a driveway or side street I would have Expected the driver to pull out----has happened enough times that I simply don’t give drivers the chance.

If I had to brake hard and proceed at 5 mph I would have .... Often I point at drivers so if they do see me they also think a bit (“Why is he pointing?”) which hopefully breaks the train of thought “I need to go, I need to go ...” Shouting is fine, but shout Before the guy starts to pull out.

Not saying you did something wrong and certainly the other guy did but You got hit. He’s in a car, you are protected by ... spandex. Next time, don’t give the guy a chance ... look up the road a couple hundred yards, and ease up so you are ready.

As you say, he just didn’t see you ... and even if he had, he might have gone. But your job (for your survival) is to make Sure he sees you. Your next job is to make sure, even if he sees you and goes, you can cut onto the grass or something----you need to check your potential escape route..

It is useful to check over your right shoulder to see if you have room, and even ease right into the middle of the lane if you cannot get the driver’s attention.

Basically Be Prepared for drivers to be stupid.

Not to say you still can’t get hit out of nowhere, or that drivers can’t be stupider than you could possibly compensate for ... but you have a Lot of control out there.

If you start feeling helpless, you need to park the bike, or stay off the roads, because you will be risking your own health.

You need to know that you are much more maneuverable than cars, can stop a Lot faster, and use a lot less of the road ... but can use it all.

You can control a lot of situations so long as you are aware of them well in advance, and make sure to Keep Yourself Safe. No one else on the road cares if you make it home, but you can usually control how safe you are.

Ride with confidence and a Lot of awareness. Getting home a minute slower beats not getting home.

Homebrew01

Same here. Many crashes racing. I don't know what enabled me to just get back on and ride, but I did.
I also know a very talented racer who crashed on wet RR tracks, and got spooked enough to quit racing.

Spoakland

Hey all - I just wanted to say I appreciate everyone's posts. My bruises are healing nicely and I'm feeling a little less freaked out by it as time rolls on. I think folks covered a lot of what's been running through my mind. Next week, I'll play around with my bike a bike just to feel more in control. Thanks for all your feedback.

OldTryGuy

Fantastic for you , baby steps if need be.

crtbike

I was riding home from a group ride one Sunday afternoon. 45 miles into the ride, I was hit by a car while out cycling the end of May. I ended up on his windshield of his car making an imprint in his windshield before flipping in air before making landfall on the pavement and then being bounced on the curb. I remained conscious the whole time of the tramatic experience. Unfortunately by bike is toast. I ended up in a ambulance and in hospital. I broke my left arm, fracture of the C6 in the neck and T11 in the back. I have a plate & 9 screws in my left arm. I was in a back and neck brace for 2 months. I am still in a neck collar but am on the weaning off process of that. I am real surprised that I have not had any flashbacks of the accident since I was conscious the whole time during the tramatic bike experience. I am 20 days from riding. My new bike is waiting on me. It seems like the calendar have just came to an steadstill. I can not wait to start riding my new bike. I know it is going to be hard to get back on the bike, but I have to. I am planning on doing group rides until I gain my confidence back.

FullGas

currently nursing a separated shoulder and a bumper crop of scabs from the latest interaction with a car...this is the 4th collision. two resulted in minor injuries, one required knee surgery, and the orthopedist hasn't made the call on the shoulder yet. will know in 10 days if I get a plate or not.

won't be able to ride for a couple of months, but am getting the bike repaired and anticipating getting on road again. postman delivered a new saddle, helmet, and shorts yesterday...

not sure what it would take to convince me to give up cycling, but whatever that threshold is, I haven't reached it yet.

travbikeman

Wish I could say that lights on front and back of the bike would be the answer to making drivers pay attention, and will agree that they help. But I've learned a few weeks ago that it's no guarantee with a close call I had to a non attentive driver. Fortunately I was paying attention and didn't ram his stinkin cute ute.

Paying attention and riding defensively might be a good idea. Michigan drivers ed (when living in MI) had taught us to drive defensively rather than offensively. Bike riding defensively maybe better as well.

But I've also witnessed very aggressive drivers driving on the rear end of family members motorcycles and then screaming at my family members for going to slow for his taste. I guess my point is you are going to come across this crud no matter where or when. Letting it keep yourself from doing what you love doing is the real tragedy.

OH and by the way....did you at least leave a dent on his hood to remind him of what he did?

jeichelberg87

Best of everything to you and yours and HAPPY CYCLING!!!

Daniel4

Keep your head moving and your eyes looking all around for any kind of potential hazard. I've either been really lucky or just really skillful because I have never been in a motor-vehicle related collision. All my wipeouts have been due to road conditions (slipping from asphalt into gravel shoulder, slipping on mud from after a heavy rain, etc) and one where I couldn't decide what a kid was going to do on her bike headed in my direction.

Spoakland

I assume so. 200 lbs of body flipping onto the hood of Beamer can't be a good thing.

RiPHRaPH

life is a full contact sport sometimes. Seriously...i would never let a stranger change my love or my life.
Get back on the horse quickly so you don't dwell on it.