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Has cycling got you in trouble with your wife/husband?

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Has cycling got you in trouble with your wife/husband?

Old 05-18-05, 02:03 PM
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Has cycling got you in trouble with your wife/husband?

I recently realized that cycling has been at the root of most of my disagreements with my spouse and am interested to know if you folks have experienced the same. I will share two stories:

1: I call this one my "the wall" speech. I accompanied my wife on her first major mountain bike ride (20 miles; 10 out and 10 back). We were in phoenix, the temp. was 105 degrees and when we hit 15 miles she just kind of stopped and wanted to die in the desert instead of getting back on the bike. Because I thought that was a very real possibility, I dug up an old speech my track coach used to give me. I stupidly told her that she had hit "the wall", the point that seperates the athlete from the recreational rider and that she was lucky to have hit that point because most people never push themselves that hard. She made it clear to me that she did not feel lucky and just what I could do with my "motivational" speech. She has never let me live that down.

2: I was riding with a buddy at South Mountain in Phoenix when I noticed a hot girl riding toward us. Because I am happily married, I notified my buddy of what was coming so he would not miss out (I am a giver that way). Boy was I surprised when, as she came closer, I realized she was my WIFE!! That was not so bad except that later on I made the mistake of telling her how we were checking her out (I thought it would make her happy). That prompted a lengthy discussion about whether or not it was appropriate for me to check out other women I see on the trails/roads.

Anyone else have similar stories?
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Old 05-18-05, 02:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Sawtooth
2: I was riding with a buddy at South Mountain in Phoenix when I noticed a hot girl riding toward us. Because I am happily married, I notified my buddy of what was coming so he would not miss out (I am a giver that way). Boy was I surprised when, as she came closer, I realized she was my WIFE!!
I think we need pictures to fully appreciate your story.
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Old 05-18-05, 02:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Sawtooth2
: I was riding with a buddy at South Mountain in Phoenix when I noticed a hot girl riding toward us. Because I am happily married, I notified my buddy of what was coming so he would not miss out (I am a giver that way). Boy was I surprised when, as she came closer, I realized she was my WIFE!! That was not so bad except that later on I made the mistake of telling her how we were checking her out (I thought it would make her happy). That prompted a lengthy discussion about whether or not it was appropriate for me to check out other women I see on the trails/roads.

Anyone else have similar stories?

hahaha
I'm afraid to tell my girlfriend that the real reason i wear such dark sunglasses is to check out the local scenery...and not the trees!
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Old 05-18-05, 02:22 PM
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I introduced my wife to biking, well reintroduced, to include her in my passion. She loves to push herself and has improved alot, but she still hasn't gotten "up to speed" (pardon the pun) to ride with my regular hammerfest and solo rides. This causes a bit of an exclusion dilema for her. I tend, but really try hard not to, feel resentful that I have to consider her schedule when wanting to ride. But that is just part of life. So yes, there has been trouble of sorts due to biking between my spouse and myself.
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Old 05-18-05, 02:47 PM
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wickcchh wickcchh (trying to make a sound like a whip cracking) wickcchh wickcchh
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Old 05-18-05, 02:53 PM
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not yet....but I'm making plans to get in trouble with my wife very soon.....she just ISN'T going to understand why I need ANOTHER NEW BIKE!>!>!>!>!
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Old 05-18-05, 03:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Dinstee
I introduced my wife to biking, well reintroduced, to include her in my passion. She loves to push herself and has improved alot, but she still hasn't gotten "up to speed" (pardon the pun) to ride with my regular hammerfest and solo rides. This causes a bit of an exclusion dilema for her. I tend, but really try hard not to, feel resentful that I have to consider her schedule when wanting to ride. But that is just part of life. So yes, there has been trouble of sorts due to biking between my spouse and myself.
Man, I can relate to that. As my wife gained skills she started riding with my all-male group of friends in my graduate school program. She was so competitive about the whole thing that she used to literally make herself sick before our weekly rides. She just could not stand the fact that she could only lay the hammer down on two of my buddies on a regular basis.
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Old 05-18-05, 03:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Dewbert
not yet....but I'm making plans to get in trouble with my wife very soon.....she just ISN'T going to understand why I need ANOTHER NEW BIKE!>!>!>!>!
Oh yeah, I forgot about that one; happens every day (my argument, that is; not actually getting another new bike).
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Old 05-18-05, 03:30 PM
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after 27 years of marriage, I am sure my wife enjoys the time Im out riding..
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Old 05-18-05, 03:34 PM
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Wifey deals with it pretty well. She was a gymnast for 16 years until she blew out a knee in a meet in college, so she understands the passion. But, she doesn't understand the money that's needed to fuel it. But, it's either bikes or a hot rodded car on a track somewhere, and bikes win every time. I can't complain.
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Old 05-18-05, 03:37 PM
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Only grief I get is - no kidding - when I'm on this forum. My wife simply can't believe I can spend this much time reading about, writing about, and looking at pictures of BIKES. She's sure I'm up to no good.
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Old 05-18-05, 03:47 PM
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At first, I too had a very hard time with my wife and the time I was taking cycling. She also had a fit with the fact that I spent so much money on my carbon, weight weenie, poseur wannabe road bike.
When I got a trainer in the winter, that really helped, because I could ride and still watch the kids while she had to go out and do her shopping etc. She was working full time, and I admit it was all very hard on her.

Then, our World suddenly got better.

In the spring, I finally told her to just quit her job. She was suffering, the kids were suffering, and I too was suffering a bit, mainly due to lack of sleep. That has already helped tremendously. All I had to do was get her to fully accept my cycling lifestyle.

So, I built her own custom road bike, taught her how to ride it, and now she is becoming a real roadie, slowly but surely. As summer gets closer, we ride more together, and really have something we can do together now. Family life has actually gotten better. Our relationship is better (less stress), and the kids are much happier.

So, now we both have road bikes.

My only problem now, is she has a tendency to snoop, and peek over my shoulder while I'm on Bike Forums. Like right now, for example.
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Old 05-18-05, 03:54 PM
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"Has cycling got you in trouble with your wife?"

Only when she feels like going out on the tandem and I have other plans to ride my single. Its the part where I don't invite her out for a ride is when she gets huffy. "She has a single and she can go out on it"...that just gets me in deeper trouble.
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Old 05-18-05, 03:57 PM
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Originally Posted by Patriot
At first, I too had a very hard time with my wife and the time I was taking cycling. She also ha fit with the fact that I spent so much money on my carbon weight weenie poseur wannabe road bike.
When I got a trainer in the winter, that really helped, because I could ride and still watch the kids while she had to go out and do her shopping etc. She was working full time, and I admit it was all very hard on her.

Then, our World suddenly got better.

In the spring, I finally told her to just quit her job. She was suffering, the kids were suffering, and I too was suffering a bit, mainly due to lack of sleep. That has already helped tremendously. All I had to do was get her to fully accept my cycling lifestyle.

So, I built her own custom road bike, taught her how to ride it, and now she is becoming a real roadie, slowly but surely. As summer gets closer, we ride more together, and really have something we can do together now. Family life has actually gotten better. Our relationship is better (less stress), and the kids are much happier.

So, now we both have road bikes.

My only problem now, is she has a tendency to snoop, and peek over my shoulder while I'm on Bike Forums. Like right now, for example.

You forgot the fact that you now feel resentment that she finds all of the good cycling deals instead of you.
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Old 05-18-05, 04:00 PM
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PLEASE, don't bring that up.
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Old 05-18-05, 04:01 PM
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Originally Posted by Patriot
PLEASE, don't bring that up.
Oh-oh.
Opening old wounds for Patriot.
Warm up the credit card honey, we're goin' shoppin'!
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Old 05-18-05, 04:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Adgooroo
Only grief I get is - no kidding - when I'm on this forum. My wife simply can't believe I can spend this much time reading about, writing about, and looking at pictures of BIKES. She's sure I'm up to no good.
Same here. She put a moratorium on the laptop in the bed. Can you believe it? Ok, that's probably reasonalbe, but.... I can stop reading the fourm any time I want. I just don't want.

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Old 05-18-05, 04:07 PM
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My wife encourages me to ride as much as possible as long as I promise her that I won't ride in high-risk areas. She thinks I have a better attitude when I'm riding often.
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Old 05-18-05, 05:18 PM
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Seems I can do whatever I want when it comes to cycling. She was OK with me buying a flatbar roadbike last month. She was OK with me returning said bike for a more expensive drop bar road bike last weekend. She just wants me to make sure that I will use it and so far I am. She'd rather support this than my other hobby.
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Old 05-18-05, 06:06 PM
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Originally Posted by Adgooroo
Only grief I get is - no kidding - when I'm on this forum. My wife simply can't believe I can spend this much time reading about, writing about, and looking at pictures of BIKES. She's sure I'm up to no good.
Yep - what he said. Wife very suspicious & thinks I'm having some sort of cyber affair.

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Old 05-18-05, 06:14 PM
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Originally Posted by cantdrv55
Seems I can do whatever I want when it comes to cycling. She was OK with me buying a flatbar roadbike last month. She was OK with me returning said bike for a more expensive drop bar road bike last weekend. She just wants me to make sure that I will use it and so far I am. She'd rather support this than my other hobby.
Okay, I'll bite, what's the other hobby
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Old 05-18-05, 09:42 PM
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you wife loves it when other men check her out i'm sure.

so tell her you're only doing your part in bringing that pleasure to other women......
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Old 05-18-05, 09:43 PM
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Yes, my wife gives my one of those looks of ok but..... when she says ok tomy going out for a ride. She aslo looks over my shoulder when on BF. She is getting use to more bikes like more kids.
My starting to race this past year is the worst especialy since I crashed last time out at ~27-30 and came home with some good road rash.
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Old 05-18-05, 10:51 PM
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First mistake- not telling her how much the bike cost or even that I had bought it. She saw it hanging in the garage. Almost three months later she started talking to me again.
Second and third mistakes - falling over twice in 6 months, first one sprained a wrist, second fall was a trip to emergency room. Since my wife is in a wheelchair, she relies on me to be healthy to transfer her. Doesn't help when pracitcing the hobby I have to keep in shape results in injury.
Now after two years she tolerates my riding, she knows I'm happier when I get to ride one day a weekend. next big mistake - the new bike, but this time I've warned her of the price and it'll be a reward for acheiving my goal of losing 20 pounds.
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Old 05-19-05, 12:27 AM
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The biggest problem I had when I was married and riding was the time away on the bike. Riding and marriage both take BIG commitments in time and can cause problems.
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