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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 05-13-20, 07:26 PM
  #13626  
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...knowing well that the boll weevil is just lookin' for a home, he surmises that the wipe weevils are just lookin' for some tush.
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Old 05-13-20, 10:02 PM
  #13627  
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While hovering over the bowl, he always gets stalled thinking in reverse P.O.V. he should wipe left for right wipe weevil acceptance.
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Old 05-14-20, 05:55 AM
  #13628  
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I think congratulations are in order; he's just been hired by a inside the beltway stink tank to consider solutions for the wipe weevils infestation. Good Luck in your examination!
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Old 05-14-20, 11:13 AM
  #13629  
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...he is the original author of the much beloved tongue twister, "How much ass would a wipe weevil wipe if a wipe weevil would wipe ass?"
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Old 05-14-20, 11:44 AM
  #13630  
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Deweloped Appo's voice wecogntion pwogwam.
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Old 05-14-20, 04:08 PM
  #13631  
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Always chooses the lesser of two weevils.
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Old 05-14-20, 04:14 PM
  #13632  
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Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
Always chooses the lesser of two weevils.
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Old 05-14-20, 04:17 PM
  #13633  
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Old 05-14-20, 06:13 PM
  #13634  
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...it's been five years, and he is still trying to convince his wife that the gerbil they extracted in the ER was actually a rogue wipe weevil.
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Old 05-15-20, 04:41 AM
  #13635  
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Dreamed he was King of the Wipe Weevils in his Maidenform bra...
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Old 05-15-20, 06:06 AM
  #13636  
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The only reason he wears shirts in public is so others can't see what he's wearing underneath them. " They just couldn't handle this" he keeps saying while looking down lovingly at the layers of straining spandex desperately trying to contain the mounds of adipose tissue jiggling away.
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Old 05-15-20, 07:01 PM
  #13637  
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...if he had a set of boobs of his own, right there all the time on his chest, with perky nipples just begging to be stroked, he would never play with them.
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Old 05-16-20, 03:57 AM
  #13638  
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Treats his body like a Temple, an Alee Shrine Temple. He rents it out for all occasions...
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Old 05-16-20, 02:05 PM
  #13639  
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He is one of the guys in the tiny cars at the Shriner's parade.

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Old 05-16-20, 03:06 PM
  #13640  
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He can lie in five languages, none of them English.
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Old 05-16-20, 04:59 PM
  #13641  
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Tells strangers to "drink up shriner" and hopes they haven't heard of George Carlin.
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Old 05-17-20, 04:46 PM
  #13642  
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Has [recently] seen his wife, Morgan Fairchild, naked.
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Old 05-17-20, 05:26 PM
  #13643  
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Offered to buy no motor? a pair of pants. From WalMart, no less.
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Old 05-17-20, 07:34 PM
  #13644  
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Is the chief fashion and manners officer for the Juggalos.
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Old 05-18-20, 04:57 AM
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His "get up and go" got up this morning, looked out the window at the same old crap it saw yesterday and turned around and went back to bed.
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Old 05-18-20, 05:09 AM
  #13646  
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Used a bucket for his "get up and go" this morning. The result:


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Old 05-18-20, 06:08 AM
  #13647  
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Originally Posted by Lemond1985 View Post
Used a bucket for his "get up and go" this morning. The result:
ftfy: not rusty enough...
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Old 05-18-20, 06:37 AM
  #13648  
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Didn't want to get too graphic, family board and all ...

Looks like you're getting plenty of iron in your diet, how ya doing on zinc and magnesium?
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Old 05-18-20, 10:40 AM
  #13649  
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Don't forget clues, he's really deficient in clues.
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Old 05-18-20, 11:21 PM
  #13650  
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...he's completely dedicated to the proposition that the lies thread shall contain nothing but lies.
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