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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 09-02-19, 01:04 PM
  #12776  
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...never feels the pressure because he's not wearing any pants. It just goes where it wants to go.
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Old 09-03-19, 07:34 AM
  #12777  
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Is used in Law School as a classic example of Truth Decay...
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Old 09-03-19, 03:34 PM
  #12778  
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Thinks Law School is the name of a band, and Tooth Decay is a music genre.
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Old 09-04-19, 04:11 PM
  #12779  
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Won this year's Nobel Prize in Physics for his revolutionary studies exploring the effects of Diet Coke and Mentos as the basis of jet propulsion.
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Old 09-04-19, 04:19 PM
  #12780  
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Is rapidly adding to the Newberry Medal body count
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Old 09-04-19, 08:10 PM
  #12781  
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Submitted his DNA to the Journal of Irreproducible Results.
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Old 09-04-19, 08:24 PM
  #12782  
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...has always been sure that DNA stands for do not ask.
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Old 09-05-19, 11:56 AM
  #12783  
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His spirit animal is a koláč.
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Old 09-05-19, 04:00 PM
  #12784  
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Is upset that his scheme to have the evidence destroyed with his phone was undone by another passenger on the roller coaster.
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Old 09-07-19, 03:34 PM
  #12785  
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...wants to drain the swamp.
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Old 09-07-19, 10:23 PM
  #12786  
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Prowls the D.C. alleys with his golden Roto Rooter.
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Old 09-08-19, 05:44 AM
  #12787  
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Pronounces it "Woto Wooter"...
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Old 09-08-19, 07:03 PM
  #12788  
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All his hare went down the dwain.
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Old 09-08-19, 11:45 PM
  #12789  
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Not really well known for his hare-brained ideas.
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Old 09-08-19, 11:49 PM
  #12790  
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Every month they must shave the top of the lab jar with his brain.
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Old 09-09-19, 06:13 AM
  #12791  
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Thinks that Abby, Abby Normal impresses the ladies as well as Bond, Jmaes Bond.
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Old 09-09-19, 07:18 AM
  #12792  
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Creates an instant party sensation when he pulls his tail between his legs, and holding it with both paws, waves it around like a firehose.
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Old 09-09-19, 04:45 PM
  #12793  
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...as a small child, he had a pet opossum. Sadly, the family fell into dire straights and one evening after a delicious meal of stew and grits, Rosalita (his possum pet) had disappeared. His parents told him that Rosalita had most likely gone to heaven to be with Jesus, but for many years, he still went out at night into the surrounding swamp looking for her.
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Old 09-09-19, 06:38 PM
  #12794  
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Once kicked out of a Dire Straights concert because the man smelled too strong.
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Old 09-10-19, 05:43 AM
  #12795  
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His liver spots have developed cirrhosis.
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Old 09-10-19, 11:06 AM
  #12796  
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They refused his offers to be an organ donor at the DMV, saying they'd take Keith Richard's but not his.
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Old 09-11-19, 10:29 PM
  #12797  
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They refused his Lowery Magic Genie organ as well.
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Old 09-12-19, 10:30 AM
  #12798  
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...one wasted an entire semester at college when he misread the course description for organic chemistry as orgasmic chemistry. It did, however, fulfill one of his prerequisites to apply to medical school. So not a complete loss.....but very disappointing.
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Old 09-12-19, 11:05 AM
  #12799  
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Majored in Orgasmic Chemistry with a minor in Pornographic Literature...
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Old 09-12-19, 12:58 PM
  #12800  
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...sometimes these days, he thinks back on his college years at FU, and is saddened that he did not take full advantage of the opportunities provided to him.
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