I am a laid-back guy.
#27
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I am a laid-back guy.
But when someone messes with me when I am riding my bike my temper spikes fast and dangerously.
It takes alot of effort for me to calm myself down which is, or course, the best plan.
My impulse is to chase down the offending driver and have a confrontation.
Seems like it has something to do with the exercise getting my juices flowing or something.
I do alot of weight lifting and don't have the temper spikes, but then I don't have
drivers honking and swerving at me with their cars while at the gym.
I wonder if others have this issue.
But when someone messes with me when I am riding my bike my temper spikes fast and dangerously.
It takes alot of effort for me to calm myself down which is, or course, the best plan.
My impulse is to chase down the offending driver and have a confrontation.
Seems like it has something to do with the exercise getting my juices flowing or something.
I do alot of weight lifting and don't have the temper spikes, but then I don't have
drivers honking and swerving at me with their cars while at the gym.
I wonder if others have this issue.
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The only time I confronted a driver is when i was riding my bike in a residential area in a designated bike lane and a police officer pulled in and stopped dead in front of me. He was on a dash mounted lap top and had his window rolled down. After nearly eating the rear end of the SUV he was driving I went up to his window and asked him what the hell he was thinking , no turn signal or any indication that he’s was going to cut me off. He said he didn’t see me ( I have a fluorescent shirt on and a flashing Lumos helmet on ) . It was mid day and a shade lined street. I told him maybe he should not be on his laptop while driving because of my attire it was obvious he was not watching the road. He apologized so I let it go and decided not to turn it in. I guess anyone can make a mistake . I tell you I was really angry and I think he could tell. He was young and I am in my sixties and I got that he truly felt bad. It was hard to calm down after I allowed myself to get that upset. I had to remind myself that I ride for all the reasons that are supposed to keep me centered and laid back, not to get upset. We are human though and all have a limit.
#30
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#31
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wafranklin Give heed to all of the above caveats regarding confrontation and giving in to rage.
I began using a helmet cam six years ago to record my rides in case there was trouble, like an accident or dangerous or harassing driver or some other encounter where I had been wronged (or possibly injured).
Seeing and hearing myself react to perceived vehicular malfeasance and injustice was an eye-opener.
First, most "close calls" and "aggressive" or "intimidating" behavior by drivers, when viewed from a safe distance in retrospect turned out to be NOTHING.
Adrenaline has a way of distorting your perception of physical distances the order of occurrences and of the intentions of others. (I suppose it's a good survival reflex from an evolutionary standpoint.)
Secondly, I was able to see how I acted and reacted and the driver's reaction to my reaction. Not productive. Usually the driver wasn't even aware they had done anything wrong. Those that did do something on purpose were scary crazy and unreasonably aggressive. And once in a while there were people who were truly upset and even shaken that they hadn't seen me or didn't realize they were getting too close.
So the camera got me to relax and think about my behavior. And reviewing my ride videos also helps me choose better strategies for my usual commute routes. It's like when I was a disk jockey on the radio in the 1980s. We used tape machines that recorded when the microphone was on so we could go back and review our performance and hopefully improve. The same thing is done in sports, acting, etc.
Helmet cams are relatively cheap these days.
My suggestion is to get one and review yourself.
And if you're lucky enough to bike and bike commute in a beautiful area like Colorado Springs, you will have mementos of the fun, beauty and joy of your rides.
I also found that after I turned 45 I started to relax and became slower to anger. Having been through the life-altering medical crises and deaths of loved ones, family and friends tends to make the seeming indignation of some a-hole driver seem irrelevant.
I'm almost 60 now and after being surrounded by family, I am happiest when I ride.
Don't let others steal your bliss.
https://www.youtube.com/user/bgvideo62/playlists
I began using a helmet cam six years ago to record my rides in case there was trouble, like an accident or dangerous or harassing driver or some other encounter where I had been wronged (or possibly injured).
Seeing and hearing myself react to perceived vehicular malfeasance and injustice was an eye-opener.
First, most "close calls" and "aggressive" or "intimidating" behavior by drivers, when viewed from a safe distance in retrospect turned out to be NOTHING.
Adrenaline has a way of distorting your perception of physical distances the order of occurrences and of the intentions of others. (I suppose it's a good survival reflex from an evolutionary standpoint.)
Secondly, I was able to see how I acted and reacted and the driver's reaction to my reaction. Not productive. Usually the driver wasn't even aware they had done anything wrong. Those that did do something on purpose were scary crazy and unreasonably aggressive. And once in a while there were people who were truly upset and even shaken that they hadn't seen me or didn't realize they were getting too close.
So the camera got me to relax and think about my behavior. And reviewing my ride videos also helps me choose better strategies for my usual commute routes. It's like when I was a disk jockey on the radio in the 1980s. We used tape machines that recorded when the microphone was on so we could go back and review our performance and hopefully improve. The same thing is done in sports, acting, etc.
Helmet cams are relatively cheap these days.
My suggestion is to get one and review yourself.
And if you're lucky enough to bike and bike commute in a beautiful area like Colorado Springs, you will have mementos of the fun, beauty and joy of your rides.
I also found that after I turned 45 I started to relax and became slower to anger. Having been through the life-altering medical crises and deaths of loved ones, family and friends tends to make the seeming indignation of some a-hole driver seem irrelevant.
I'm almost 60 now and after being surrounded by family, I am happiest when I ride.
Don't let others steal your bliss.
https://www.youtube.com/user/bgvideo62/playlists
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#32
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I only lose it when an aggressive, vicious dog surprises me and adrenaline squirts into my bloodstream. I find myself screaming obscenities at the top of my lungs, totally out of my control to restrain, which sometimes causes a dog to back off. As for lunatics in motor vehicles, I keep in mind the weight differential and don't do anything to provoke. Kind of like dealing with a boss that has fallen into the pit of hubris and feels it is his right to lash out and throw tantrums. Avoid, ignore, live to fight another day. I carry pepper spray but don't imagine it will save me from any arrogant fool in a pickup or SUV. Cars are rarely a problem where I ride.
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confronting leads to escalation which leads to great youtube videos. so the lesson to be learned is ride with a gopro or cycliq type camera.
#36
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Looks like dangerous drivers get an almost universal free pass from cyclists. That's sure to win them over to our side.
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Caspar Milquetoast is a comic strip character created by H. T. Webster for his cartoon series The Timid Soul. Webster described Caspar Milquetoast as "the man who speaks softly and gets hit with a big stick".
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The whole post was terrific; just a correction to honor one of my favorite cartoonists of the early 20th century:
Caspar Milquetoast is a comic strip character created by H. T. Webster for his cartoon series The Timid Soul. Webster described Caspar Milquetoast as "the man who speaks softly and gets hit with a big stick".
Caspar Milquetoast is a comic strip character created by H. T. Webster for his cartoon series The Timid Soul. Webster described Caspar Milquetoast as "the man who speaks softly and gets hit with a big stick".
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That's very obvious or you would think otherwise. Even in the last 10 years the decline has been astonishing, let alone compared to how it was in the 70s.
I've been to dallas before and it's not remotely as dense. From the nonsense you posted in the thread about headphones it's obvious you don't have much worries about cars. This is almost certainly literally the worst place in the country for bicycles, that's no hyperbole. If it were more dense then cars would have more limitations and be slowed down more, if it were more open then there would be less traffic and fewer problems. The place I live is the most convenient for me in the city but it is also not great for bicycles as people use my main crossstreet as a raceway to cross the town.
I've been to dallas before and it's not remotely as dense. From the nonsense you posted in the thread about headphones it's obvious you don't have much worries about cars. This is almost certainly literally the worst place in the country for bicycles, that's no hyperbole. If it were more dense then cars would have more limitations and be slowed down more, if it were more open then there would be less traffic and fewer problems. The place I live is the most convenient for me in the city but it is also not great for bicycles as people use my main crossstreet as a raceway to cross the town.
#40
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The only time I confronted a driver is when i was riding my bike in a residential area in a designated bike lane and a police officer pulled in and stopped dead in front of me. He was on a dash mounted lap top and had his window rolled down. After nearly eating the rear end of the SUV he was driving I went up to his window and asked him what the hell he was thinking , no turn signal or any indication that he’s was going to cut me off. He said he didn’t see me ( I have a fluorescent shirt on and a flashing Lumos helmet on ) . It was mid day and a shade lined street. I told him maybe he should not be on his laptop while driving because of my attire it was obvious he was not watching the road. He apologized so I let it go and decided not to turn it in. I guess anyone can make a mistake . I tell you I was really angry and I think he could tell. He was young and I am in my sixties and I got that he truly felt bad. It was hard to calm down after I allowed myself to get that upset. I had to remind myself that I ride for all the reasons that are supposed to keep me centered and laid back, not to get upset. We are human though and all have a limit.
I actually yelled at a cop once. He had come up from behind me on my left, he sped up to pass me right before the corner, and just as he was passing me, not before, flipped on his blues and turned right directly front towards me. I didn't have time to brake and would have been struck by the SUV if I had, so all I could do was scramble to the right while going straight at the intersection, which caused him to slam his brakes because I was now directly in front of him. He then had the audacity to turn off his blues, roll down his window and yell "you need to look out" at which point I yelled back "no YOU need to look ". He didn't pull me over or say another word, which made me conclude two things--there was a dash cam that showed I was clearly in his view, and that he had no reason otherwise to turn on his blues, which is clearly an admission he knew I was there riding properly.
I have to say, I was a little shocked at myself for not missing a beat before yelling at him.
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I work hard to avoid troublesome (high traffic) areas. Bike vs. car is the proverbial bring a knife to a gunfight. If I want a fight, I know where to find it: the internet.
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#42
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I try and wave to / thank drivers who respect me and quietly ignore those who don't. I'm not riding for their amusement and I'm not going to let them provoke me into making a scene.
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Ride your bike so as not to provoke car drivers with your arrogant riding. Bike is not an automobile and should be ridden accordingly. I use both as most of us do and we don't cause problem. Problematic are those bikers who are saving the Earth by riding bikes and who developed resentment towards those who use cars.
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I am a laid-back guy.
I have previously posted to several threads with this recurrent theme:
I am a laid-back guy. But when someone messes with me when I am riding my bike my temper spikes fast and my impulse is to chase down the offending driver and have a confrontation. Seems like it has something to do with the exercise getting my juices flowing or something.
I wonder if others have this issue.
I wonder if others have this issue.
I get angry for a bit and then quickly remind myself of the much larger percentage of motorists who safely and quietly interacted with me on my ride.
Ignoring the harassers is the best. They are upset and hoping to get you upset. Don't give them the satisfaction]
Ignoring the harassers is the best. They are upset and hoping to get you upset. Don't give them the satisfaction]
"Do you ever confront bad drivers?"
…How to get the message out? I find threads about what to say to a driver futile, since these are brief, often emotion laden encounters, and often the cyclist makes a bad impression
I have in the past posted about giving “bicyclist curses,” and “bicyclist blessings”; about 5 blessings a day, and about 3 curses a week.
…How to get the message out? I find threads about what to say to a driver futile, since these are brief, often emotion laden encounters, and often the cyclist makes a bad impression
I have in the past posted about giving “bicyclist curses,” and “bicyclist blessings”; about 5 blessings a day, and about 3 curses a week.
I always think those self-absorbed cagers are only restrained by the thought of scratching their cars, or the hassle of filing police reports.
My only satisfactory retribution is to give them my previously-described Bicyclist Curse. (I repeatedly jab my pointed right index finger in their direction, while shouting an accusatory, ”You, you, you…”). The possibility of metaphysical retribution is more satisfying than the middle finger.
I do also bestow Bicyclist Blessings on drivers who show even a modicum of respect, with a wave of the hand….
My only satisfactory retribution is to give them my previously-described Bicyclist Curse. (I repeatedly jab my pointed right index finger in their direction, while shouting an accusatory, ”You, you, you…”). The possibility of metaphysical retribution is more satisfying than the middle finger.
I do also bestow Bicyclist Blessings on drivers who show even a modicum of respect, with a wave of the hand….
i tell good drivers they will be blessed by the Pope of Boyleston Avenue.
...So, @Maelochs, tell the bad drivers, woe unto them, for they shall be cursed by the Pope of Boylston Street.
*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boylston_Street
*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boylston_Street
...:A couple weeks ago a nice lady patiently followed me on a steep narrow downhill run of about a quarter mile. At the bottom of the hill we both stopped at a red light and I told her Ihad given her a bicyclist blessing. She somewhat bewilderedly replied she was not in a hurry.
When I have caught up with an accursed driver I have not informed them, but did continue jabbing my finger to indicate "shame on you." To inform them of my curse may be too antagonistic, with repercussions.
When I have caught up with an accursed driver I have not informed them, but did continue jabbing my finger to indicate "shame on you." To inform them of my curse may be too antagonistic, with repercussions.
Last edited by Jim from Boston; 05-31-20 at 05:15 AM.
#49
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skinny guys
Since you are cycling you are probably in better shape than the driver who is hassling you.
You are going to have better leg-work.
Keep your fists up just under your eyes to ward off blows and jab when you get a chance.
You are out for exercise anyway, right?
#50
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People, in general, are idiots; seriously, we're still just monkeys with an enlarged frontal lobe. Our society has laws which give you legal leverage over their idiocy which is supposed to act as some kind of deterrent. However, this doesn't change the fact that people are still, and always will be, idiots. So what I'm trying to say is, don't get too worked up over the dumb stuff they do. If they honk at you or endanger your well-being, let them pass and be thankful you may never have to see, or deal with, them again. Because, if you think about, cars and motorists, are just another calculated risk inherent in road riding. If you wish to not deal with them, move to gravel or trails.
Last edited by mrblue; 05-31-20 at 12:55 PM.
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