Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2
12-29-19, 07:48 PM
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His has an ingrown toenail. The neighborhood dogs stay away.
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12-30-19, 10:56 AM
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Everyone stays away - he even had to get a PO box because the mail man refused to go back.
12-30-19, 11:30 AM
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...it's been many years since he got mail that did not come in a plain brown wrapper.
...it's been many years since he got mail that did not come in a plain brown wrapper.
12-31-19, 09:29 AM
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His mail arrives slowly day by day then disappears completely one day a week. While the 50 gallon container seems a bit large, he’s satisfied with the new combined delivery and pickup though he wishes whomever is sending him coffee grounds, used condoms & eggshells would have the courtesy of wrapping them in a plain brown paper.
Last edited by Jseis; 12-31-19 at 10:47 AM.
12-31-19, 10:55 AM
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...he's jealous that I haven't needed to buy coffee or condoms in years.
...he's jealous that I haven't needed to buy coffee or condoms in years.
12-31-19, 01:06 PM
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Ended his bid for the Presidency today and claimed "I would have won..."
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12-31-19, 01:25 PM
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...doesn't understand the electoral college. And appears to not realize the election is still almost a year away.
...doesn't understand the electoral college. And appears to not realize the election is still almost a year away.
12-31-19, 02:31 PM
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Has me confused with someone who cares...
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12-31-19, 04:16 PM
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Is confused about everything.
12-31-19, 04:22 PM
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...he's on my list to get a condom full of coffee grounds.
...he's on my list to get a condom full of coffee grounds.
12-31-19, 05:26 PM
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Reads coffee grounds in condoms like some read tea leaves.
12-31-19, 05:34 PM
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Thinks living in a condominium will get him safe sex...
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12-31-19, 06:24 PM
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Carefully put his deposits in the safety deposit box knowing full well the bank vault is impenetrable and he’s really into safe sex.
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Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
12-31-19, 06:36 PM
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I got his psychoanalyst drunk last night and before she passed out she told me he has this phobia of clean underwear. "Scares the poop out of him!"
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12-31-19, 08:57 PM
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After his 3rd try at “she told me he”, he switched sides and never looked back.
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Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
12-31-19, 09:51 PM
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...will realize tomorrow morning that he is completely out of coffee and will be wishing he had kept some of those used coffee grounds to re-brew one more time.
...will realize tomorrow morning that he is completely out of coffee and will be wishing he had kept some of those used coffee grounds to re-brew one more time.
12-31-19, 11:46 PM
on by
His only New Year's resolution is to live all of 2020 in the ah, huh, third person plural, uh, present accusative imperative.
01-01-20, 08:56 AM
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After his behavior last night it looks like his copy of "The Big Book of Apologies For All Occasions" will get some use this morning.
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01-01-20, 02:52 PM
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Still has leftover lies from last year.
01-01-20, 08:30 PM
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Pays 5 cents for each UPC tagged lie as long as it was sold in Illinois and has been washed, rinsed, and air dried.
Last edited by Jseis; 01-01-20 at 08:34 PM.
01-01-20, 08:46 PM
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Could get a DIME in Michigan and Oregon.
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01-01-20, 09:20 PM
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Thinks lies in Oregon are worth 10 cents and that he could buy this entire thread for a month’s rent.
01-01-20, 09:28 PM
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...ever since pot went legal there in 2012, all his lies have the faint odor of bongwater.
...ever since pot went legal there in 2012, all his lies have the faint odor of bongwater.
01-01-20, 11:37 PM
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Has wanted cherry flavored bongwater for a long time, but Coca-Cola won't make it.
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01-02-20, 02:07 PM
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...New Year's Eve celebrations found him at the Coconut Tiki Bar and Karaoke Lounge, dressed up like one of the Four Seasons. singing alto harmony on "Sherry Baby".
...New Year's Eve celebrations found him at the Coconut Tiki Bar and Karaoke Lounge, dressed up like one of the Four Seasons. singing alto harmony on "Sherry Baby".
