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Delivery by donkey would have been quicker

Old 04-05-19, 09:07 AM
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Delivery by donkey would have been quicker

If I would have known how long it would take to ship my table saw from a Lowes store (only 3 hours away) to my home I would have picked it up myself. I ordered it on Monday thinking that was more than adequate time to deliver it to my place by this weekend ... which is when I want to work on a project with it. Although the shipping label was created on Tuesday morning, according to the UPS tracking website, it hadn't been picked up from the store until Thursday afternoon. Now I'm being told it won't be delivered until Wednesday of next week. Seriously, in today's modern shipping world ... how long should it take to deliver something to your home ... especially since it's relatively local???

I'm now researching how to start my own courier business using donkeys ... or since I'm in Canada, maybe I should consider using moose. Longer legs for faster transport
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Old 04-05-19, 09:13 AM
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everyone knows jackalopes are the best courier animals
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Old 04-05-19, 10:02 AM
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Originally Posted by Alfster View Post
I'm now researching how to start my own courier business using donkeys ... or since I'm in Canada, maybe I should consider using moose. Longer legs for faster transport
I believe moose are more available in your area than donkeys.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:04 AM
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Moose will work during the winter too.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:05 AM
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Originally Posted by bigbenaugust View Post
I believe moose are more available in your area than donkeys.
You'd be surprised. I hear a donkey braying each morning when I wake up. I live on an acreage with a horse farm nearby. Apparently they also have donkeys.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Alfster View Post
You'd be surprised. I hear a donkey braying each morning when I wake up. I live on an acreage with a horse farm nearby. Apparently they also have donkeys.
I am a little. Donkeys are cheaper than drones, too.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:12 AM
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Can't you train maple trees, like in those Lord of the Rings movies?
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Old 04-05-19, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
Can't you train maple trees, like in those Lord of the Rings movies?
If I come upon a certified tree whisperer I'll give it a try. Although there is a high risk of employee absenteeism when there are forest fires in the area.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:37 AM
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Origin of package can be only 10 miles away from you but it can be transported to a "processing center" 500 miles away before it gets to your door.
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Old 04-05-19, 10:51 AM
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How do you define 3 hours away?

3 hours by puddle jumper with a once a month service?
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Old 04-05-19, 11:34 AM
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Hey, I ordered a tripod from costco (it was in stock) that was 2 pounds heavy, and 14 inches long, folded. Web page said 5-7 business days. I ordered it December 28th, it arrived a month later. Had to go across the country. I didn't know they were delivering by Conestoga wagon and 20 mule team.

This was a web only item... no way I could drive to the store and get it. Musta been custom made.
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Old 04-05-19, 12:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Alfster View Post
If I come upon a certified tree whisperer I'll give it a try. Although there is a high risk of employee absenteeism when there are forest fires in the area.
Who certifies tree whisperers? I think maybe I should try to get royalties or something, given my name.
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Old 04-05-19, 12:10 PM
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Originally Posted by CliffordK View Post
How do you define 3 hours away?

3 hours by puddle jumper with a once a month service?
This old lady in a grocery store started talking to me the other day. She said she found New England (where I grew up) very confusing because every time she asked for directions, people would measure things in minutes. The store is about ten minutes that way. She looked at me and said "these people don't know if I'm walking, driving, or riding a bicycle. What does ten minutes mean?"
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Old 04-05-19, 12:19 PM
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Just store the body in the freezer until the saw arrives.
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Old 04-05-19, 12:59 PM
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With websites offering 'free shipping', they sometimes game the system to get the lowest possible shipping costs, and the shipping companies do the same thing. The result is your item can sit for a few days in a warehouse somewhere until there's enough stuff to make a load profitable.

Example I experienced recently: I live in Southern California, ordered a few art prints from an on-line company. The prints shipped from an address in Ohio. However, the order got split and a few shipped 4 days after I'd ordered them, the rest shipped 10 days after I'd ordered, and the packages took two and three weeks (respectively) to get to me. Definitely annoying. Couldn't they just hold an order until all the parts were in stock? And isn't there a way to ship stuff as small as a tube with art prints faster that 10 days?
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Old 04-05-19, 01:36 PM
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Originally Posted by indyfabz View Post
Just store the body in the freezer until the saw arrives.
I live in Canada. Everywhere is a freezer. The body stays outside .
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Old 04-05-19, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by genec View Post
I didn't know they were delivering by Conestoga wagon and 20 mule team.
So that's my competition then. Good to know. Although I'm pretty sure a team of moose (mooses, moosie, meese) could have improved on your delivery time. Next time check with me for a quote. I only accept Canadian Loonies. You can trade US dollars for Loonies at any Tim Hortons
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Old 04-05-19, 01:44 PM
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
Who certifies tree whisperers? I think maybe I should try to get royalties or something, given my name.
That would be any Canadian ... including the ones living in the US. Try Celine Dion or Justin Bieber ... just make sure you're complimentary about their music ... especially with Celine.
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Old 04-05-19, 01:45 PM
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Originally Posted by roadfix View Post
Origin of package can be only 10 miles away from you but it can be transported to a "processing center" 500 miles away before it gets to your door.
I think they sent mine back to their China processing center.
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Old 04-05-19, 09:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Alfster View Post
So that's my competition then. Good to know. Although I'm pretty sure a team of moose (mooses, moosie, meese) could have improved on your delivery time. Next time check with me for a quote. I only accept Canadian Loonies. You can trade US dollars for Loonies at any Tim Hortons
The real irony is I ordered that tripod well in advance of taking a very long RV trek across the states... I really wanted it for photos along the way.

My neighbor retrieved it days after I left. If I stop somewhere, long enough, I may have it shipped to me... but hell, I'm on the east coast now, just way south of where the tripod originally started... looking for "Floridaman," at the moment. Heard the other day that it is "mating season" for gators, and to keep an eye out for 'em (shades of "Hook" eh?). I suspect I'll be headed north before too long... and that tripod would just be chasing me.
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Old 04-06-19, 08:51 AM
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Originally Posted by genec View Post
Hey, I ordered a tripod from costco (it was in stock) that was 2 pounds heavy, and 14 inches long, folded. Web page said 5-7 business days. I ordered it December 28th, it arrived a month later. Had to go across the country. I didn't know they were delivering by Conestoga wagon and 20 mule team.

This was a web only item... no way I could drive to the store and get it. Musta been custom made.
One of my cousins lived in Alaska from the 50's to 90's, and some of his mail would take a long time to get to him when someone at the Post Office thought the AK in his address meant Arkansas instead of Alaska.
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Old 04-06-19, 09:08 AM
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I've from the era of clipping out mail order forms in magazines, actually sending cash in the mail, and waiting 4 to 6 weeks for delivery, then forgetting about the order completely, and thinking it's Christmas when opening the package after it arrives.

So today's shipping of online tracking and 1 1/2 week average delivery times I find as informative of where my item is, but I find it as not as much fun.
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Old 04-06-19, 10:04 AM
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Just order free shipping items from China or Taiwan. You can reignite that spirit of mystery. I've had stuff take so long, when the weird little puffy envelope showed up, I had to open it to get to the "ah hah" moment.

Do not try this with Japan. I somewhat mistakenly ordered an item off of eBay not seeing that the seller was in Japan. It arrived in 3 days-- faster than I can get something via USPS from Illinois in many cases.

Same story for things coming out of NZ/Australia, it seems. I got a saddlebag from NZ in 5 days. Apparently, going the other way can take ages.

I live close to so many Amazon Distribution Facilities that same day shipping is an option for many items. I ordered a USB battery pack at 11am and had it before 5pm... on a Saturday. Free shipping with Prime.
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Old 04-06-19, 10:08 AM
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I will admit I sometimes spend a lot of time watching the live, up to the minute, tracking of my Amazon deliveries on my laptop. These Amazon vans can spend all day within just a single square mile area delivering packages.
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Old 04-06-19, 09:10 PM
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
Who certifies tree whisperers? I think maybe I should try to get royalties or something, given my name.
Do we have the registered trademark R in our fonts?
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