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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 06-30-20, 07:14 PM
  #13926  
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...he was recently elected shop steward for his Lollipop Guild local.

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Old 06-30-20, 08:06 PM
  #13927  
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He's short and his mom dresses him funny...
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i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 06-30-20, 08:40 PM
  #13928  
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...everyone tells him that shop steward is a very important position. They do it in high pitched, squeaky sounding voices.
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Old 06-30-20, 10:41 PM
  #13929  
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It's all fun and games until he sends out the flying monkeys.
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Old 07-01-20, 03:49 AM
  #13930  
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If he only had a brain...
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i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-01-20, 05:48 AM
  #13931  
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That's what everyone says about you. And pants, they wish you had pants and a brain
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Old 07-01-20, 06:01 AM
  #13932  
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His fur is the source of skijor 's high grade cooties. Unaware of their value, he gives them away for free.
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i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-01-20, 07:11 AM
  #13933  
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In his mom's basement, he alone celebrates his 3rd grade class reunions.
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Old 07-01-20, 08:24 AM
  #13934  
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Got in heated discussion with wife over problem flatulence.
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Old 07-01-20, 08:53 AM
  #13935  
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Had same discussion with his wife, but about who was going to scrape and repaint the burnt paint on the bathroom walls.
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Old 07-01-20, 08:56 AM
  #13936  
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...his profile on Grindr says "wishing for pants and looking for love."
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Old 07-01-20, 09:09 AM
  #13937  
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Apparently, has been searching through Grindr.
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Old 07-01-20, 11:38 AM
  #13938  
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...whenever he watches an X-files rerun, that part where it says "The Truth Is Out There" immediately reminds him of his misadventures on Grindr.
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Old 07-01-20, 02:20 PM
  #13939  
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Earned the nickname "Dirty Fonzie" in college for attempting a very unpopular sex move.

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Old 07-01-20, 03:25 PM
  #13940  
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Is too short for the lollipop guild.
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Old 07-01-20, 06:46 PM
  #13941  
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The great disappointment of his life is that his work alongside the Wicked Witch of the West as The Farting Possum got lost on the cutting room floor...
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i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-01-20, 06:56 PM
  #13942  
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He was the inspiration for the character of the Cigarette Smoking Man on The X-Files.
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Old 07-01-20, 07:50 PM
  #13943  
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...always asks on those online dating websites if she smokes after sex. Only dates the ones who answer yes. Continues to be disappointed when he looks down there and it turns out to be a lie.
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Old 07-01-20, 08:10 PM
  #13944  
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Was seen fleeing from Castle Anthrax, screaming that it was too perilous.
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Old 07-01-20, 10:27 PM
  #13945  
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Was stripped of his Dead Head groupie status when he was caught in the closet wearing an Anthrax tee shirt.
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Old 07-01-20, 11:36 PM
  #13946  
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...his garage band in the 70's was named "The Ingrate Dead".
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Old 07-02-20, 03:05 AM
  #13947  
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His was the Dreadful Grate.
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Old 07-02-20, 04:23 AM
  #13948  
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Plays in the ironically named group, Roadkill.
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-02-20, 06:48 AM
  #13949  
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A rusted Whitworth spanner in the toolbox of life.
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Old 07-02-20, 06:59 AM
  #13950  
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"Whitworth !!?!".........sloooowly he turned. Inch by inch, step by step.
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