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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 07-10-20, 08:38 AM
  #14051  
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Is in the Guinness Book of Records for largest collection of Big Gulp cups.
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Old 07-10-20, 09:58 AM
  #14052  
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...he is in the Guinness Book of Records as the owner of the largest and most extensive collection of Guinness empties.
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Old 07-10-20, 02:20 PM
  #14053  
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In the Guinness Book of World Records for the most failed attempts to get in the Guinness Book of World Records...
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i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-10-20, 05:59 PM
  #14054  
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Never learned to sew.


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Old 07-10-20, 06:39 PM
  #14055  
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Has no appreciation for fashion statements.
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-10-20, 07:19 PM
  #14056  
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...as a wildly popular social media influencer in matters of fashion, he is often forced to sew his own trendy outfits, from Simplicity patterns he buys at thrift stores.
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Old 07-10-20, 08:43 PM
  #14057  
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His choice of fabric is canvas, with his clothing attire sporting the label of "Tents by Omar".
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Old 07-11-20, 04:32 AM
  #14058  
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Because he's left-handed he wears his tighty-whities inside out, and I quote him here. " to facilitate a quick draw".
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-11-20, 06:38 AM
  #14059  
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That's not the only thing that's quick down there.
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Old 07-11-20, 06:42 AM
  #14060  
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Is World Famous as the home base for the fastest, toughest, hungriest cooties ever known.
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-11-20, 07:37 AM
  #14061  
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His victory dance is “dropping the long bomb”.
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Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
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Old 07-11-20, 08:26 AM
  #14062  
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...his self identity is centered on the Dance Dance Revolution game at the local arcade. Recently defeated on the new A20 machine, at the grand reopening sweepstakes competition, by 11 year old Felicity Sandstrom, he has been practicing 6 hours daily for the grudge rematch scheduled for the end off July.
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Old 07-11-20, 08:46 AM
  #14063  
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Due to his early start with the spiked punch at his high school reunion last year, he is still recovering from his rendition of The Twist.
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Old 07-11-20, 09:21 AM
  #14064  
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His personal physician strongly advised him to change his diet as he's a "fart attack just waiting to happen".
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-11-20, 11:24 AM
  #14065  
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Has been banned from the entire Taco Bell chain.
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Old 07-11-20, 12:15 PM
  #14066  
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...he was once chained and led on a leash by his B+D girlfriend, who goes by the name of Taco Belle.
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Old 07-11-20, 03:15 PM
  #14067  
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Frequently chained and led to perform unspeakable acts in Braille.
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Old 07-11-20, 04:54 PM
  #14068  
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...made his reputation as a performer doing mime for the blind.
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Old 07-11-20, 05:00 PM
  #14069  
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Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
His personal physician strongly advised him to change his diet as he's a "fart attack just waiting to happen".
Is not the "smart feller"...
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I seem to have lost what little mind I had left before this all started.
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Old 07-11-20, 06:41 PM
  #14070  
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Accidentally sat on a Toblerone.

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Old 07-11-20, 07:16 PM
  #14071  
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Read Lies for Geniuses in a few minutes.
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Make Amerika Grate Cheese Again
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Old 07-11-20, 07:34 PM
  #14072  
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...whenever he wants to use the plural of "genius" in a sentence, he always has to stop for a minute and ask himself, "Is it "geniuses", or is it "genii" ?"
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Old 07-11-20, 08:08 PM
  #14073  
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Still working out meeces versus mouses. "There must be a better word!" he cries...
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Originally Posted by CarlJohnson View Post
i dont care who he is cos im carl and im awesome
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Old 07-11-20, 08:19 PM
  #14074  
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Achieved his lifelong goal of being able to sweep the floors of the Einstein Museum.
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Old 07-11-20, 10:27 PM
  #14075  
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...he hates those meeces to pieces.

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