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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 07-13-19, 09:20 AM
  #12501  
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Is now barred from every KFC after another unfortunate accident with endogenous methane in NC.
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Old 07-13-19, 12:56 PM
  #12502  
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...his designs for a methane powered rocket to Uranus have set tongues wagging.
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Old 07-13-19, 05:07 PM
  #12503  
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On his way to a pharmacy to find out if they have some potion or lotion to relieve his itchy, painful asteroid.
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Old 07-13-19, 07:11 PM
  #12504  
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Has an asteroid belt.
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Old 07-13-19, 09:51 PM
  #12505  
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...the eldest child of Ken and Barbie, he grew up in a dream house and has no anus.
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Old 07-14-19, 12:42 AM
  #12506  
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His body parts have a 25% tariff on them.
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Old 07-14-19, 07:33 AM
  #12507  
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Has recently been mistaken for a Ziggy Stardust Barbie. Hipsters keep wanting to add him/it to their collection.
https://ultimateclassicrock.com/david-bowie-barbie/
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Old 07-14-19, 08:07 AM
  #12508  
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His version of Ground Control is putting 10 lbs of dirt in a 5 lb bag.
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Old 07-14-19, 09:24 AM
  #12509  
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Used Ground Controlís Pooptastic Kid-No-More lawn treatment to halt a fast spreading infestation.
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Old 07-14-19, 01:29 PM
  #12510  
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Voted by his High School class as Most Likely to Spread Infestation.
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Old 07-14-19, 03:07 PM
  #12511  
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Wants more tail. Gets more donuts.
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Old 07-14-19, 03:35 PM
  #12512  
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Thinks I have regrets.

EDIT: I have never been accused by a donut of assault.
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Old 07-14-19, 04:30 PM
  #12513  
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...his new food invention of the salted donut, made from pretzel dough, promises to be the next cronut. He plans to market it to the hypertensive senior demographic.
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Old 07-14-19, 04:41 PM
  #12514  
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Wants a piece of that market, because he knows a lot of hypertensive seniors he could sell to here.
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Old 07-14-19, 09:43 PM
  #12515  
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Dawned on him after a stoners binge that Sativa flour and CDB oil was a seniors triple whammy WhoaNut covering hunger, healthcare and highness.
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Old 07-14-19, 11:30 PM
  #12516  
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His version of Woodstock is having numerous stacked cords around the house.
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Old 07-15-19, 03:13 AM
  #12517  
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Ordered some of that influencer bathwater to see if it might make him cool.
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Old 07-15-19, 06:41 AM
  #12518  
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His parents threw him out with the bathwater, and he's been a wandering soul ever since.
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Old 07-15-19, 09:14 AM
  #12519  
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...because he last bathed in 1971, he has significant influence on anyone in his immediate vicinity.
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Old 07-15-19, 10:53 AM
  #12520  
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Outdid the $30 bathwater shysters by selling original dirt from Woodstock he's been wearing since then after finding Youtube videos on how to bathe.
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Old 07-15-19, 12:05 PM
  #12521  
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His 3.5JACK vanity plate is shunned by Apple fanbois.
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Old 07-15-19, 12:29 PM
  #12522  
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...until very recently, he thought that a 3.5 jack referred to the erectile dysfunction experienced after the third time.
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Old 07-15-19, 02:51 PM
  #12523  
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Has been recycling our old lies and counting on our memories not being what they used to be to allow him to get away with it.
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Old 07-15-19, 06:53 PM
  #12524  
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Stuck a spork into @3alarmer to see if he was done...
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Old 07-15-19, 08:13 PM
  #12525  
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...famous for his creation of the line, "If you spork us, do we not bleed ?"
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