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What's the WORST bike that dares to call itself a bicycle?

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What's the WORST bike that dares to call itself a bicycle?

Old 05-18-19, 11:12 PM
  #51  
Jax Rhapsody
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I've worked magic on some of these bikes. Thread is effing hilarious, though. One of my fixes for those walmart 50lb mountain bikes with the stamped steel "speed reducers" is replacing them with the sidepulls from Hyper bmx bikes, which are actually forge casted aluminum, paired with vbrake levers. Those bmx bikes actually have some of the best caliper brakes of any walmart bike.
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Old 05-19-19, 03:46 AM
  #52  
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This old CCM did absolutely nothing to blow my kilt up...



And this Raleigh Record was a close second for worst bike ever owned...
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Old 05-19-19, 06:17 AM
  #53  
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Originally Posted by Dan Burkhart
Yes, but if you go back a bit further, like 40 or 45 years ago, lots of department store bikes were re badged Raleigh 3 speeds, and many of those are still in service today.
OK. This is a true "C&V" thread (i.e., old). I posted to it 10 years ago. Good one, though. I remember the worst part of dealing with low-end bikes "back in the day" (Murray, most Huffy bikes, AMF, Columbia, Kia, Sears, some Ross bikes, Iverson, Power King, a few Raleighs, etc.) was trying to true the wheels. The walls of the steel rims weaved in and out, and the things never came out of the factory properly laced. Add to this curb jumping by kids, and you could understand why your local bike mechanic had a bottle of booze hidden near his work bench. I also was shocked by the way manufacturers crimped the seat and chain stays around the stamped drop outs. Extra long brake and gear cables fastened with plastic clips also caused my jaw to drop. Improperly aligned stays and forks, cheap decals, paint applied to bare metal without a primer, white metal anchor bolts that broke when you tightened them, etc. I can still remember how much the junk bikes made me appreciate well made (and indestructable) bikes like Schwinns were. Then I fell in love with mid-range Fujis, and similar Japanese bikes

Last edited by cycleheimer; 05-19-19 at 06:34 AM.
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Old 05-19-19, 06:49 AM
  #54  
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By far the worst bicycle I have ever owned was a 1970s gas pipe Sears Free Spirit built by Murray or Huffy. It probably weighed at least 35 lbs, had horrid Elgin derailleurs, the usual Ashtabula crank, 26" steel rims, etc. Putting on toeclips and straps, an early Campag. Gran Sport rear derailleur, SunTour downtube shift levers (with shim, of course) on the undersized downtube, and a custom-built 16-17-18-19-23 SunTour freewheel made it tolerable for short lunchtime errands. It was eventually stolen(!) from the bike rack at work. I was out the $10 yard sale purchase price, plus a few of the many spare parts I had accumulated over the years.
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Old 05-19-19, 07:07 AM
  #55  
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How about the "Black Hawk/Harley Davidson/Road Master", a very confused bicycle.




I wince every time I look at that "bike" seat, only the young could ride it/
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Old 05-19-19, 07:24 AM
  #56  
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Originally Posted by since6
How about the "Black Hawk/Harley Davidson/Road Master", a very confused bicycle.




I wince every time I look at that "bike" seat, only the young could ride it/

I wonder: did that speedometer cable die from hitting incredible RsPM or did it willingly give up when it realized it's life had to meaning?
Although those brake calipers might be an indication of expected speeds.
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Old 05-19-19, 07:32 AM
  #57  
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Except for bowling pin machines, everything that the suit trash at AMF got there hands on, was turned into absolute crap. I couldn’t even imagine riding one of their bikes.
Tim
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Old 05-19-19, 07:56 AM
  #58  
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I would love to have that! Not to ride of course!
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Old 05-19-19, 09:11 AM
  #59  
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Kite005, it's your lucky day, it is up for auction on Shopgoodwill at about $10.00, but you'll need to have PakMail p/u and ship, but better hurry as auction closes in 10 hrs. and there's one bid.

Good luck and if you win got to know it must have a motorcycle engine noise maker buried somewhere in that plastic, or, how to drive the riders on the bike trail crazy.

I know the latter from experience, we have the occasional two cycle powered bike and the noise and stink of burned oil.... it gets you real primitive.
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Old 05-19-19, 09:17 AM
  #60  
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Originally Posted by since6
Kite005, it's your lucky day, it is up for auction on Shopgoodwill at about $10.00, but you'll need to have PakMail p/u and ship, but better hurry as auction closes in 10 hrs. and there's one bid.

Good luck and if you win got to know it must have a motorcycle engine noise maker buried somewhere in that plastic, or, how to drive the riders on the bike trail crazy.

I know the latter from experience, we have the occasional two cycle powered bike and the noise and stink of burned oil.... it gets you real primitive.
I was thinking about a 8 of hearts or a king of spades for the sound!
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Old 05-19-19, 09:21 AM
  #61  
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Bianchi84 a bike like this has "7%+ hill" for grade school boys pushing it to the top for a, death ride, written all over it, likely explanation for speedometer cable going "Kaaabloooey".

But then dating self that was in my childhood.

LOL, what possessed my parents when for 10th birthday they gave me a functioning bow and arrow set, of course the first thing me and best friend HAD to do is see how far it would shoot straight up into the sky, followed by mad dash to get under cover of the garage roof when 'insightful' comment of best buddy "Wonder where it's going to come down?" was realized.

No it didn't come down on roof of house or garage which would have been a parenting moment for my father to come home to, "Hmmm, arrow pointing strait up through the roof" and a subsequent learning experience for me.
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Old 05-19-19, 10:26 AM
  #62  
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Old School, very good Kite005, but only with the correct spring loaded wooden clothes pin, plastic just won't do.
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Old 05-19-19, 11:19 AM
  #63  
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Originally Posted by dgodave
The FIRENZE.... the bane of Bay Area bike shops in the 80s.
.
I had a Firenze once, the braze-ons were paint-ons, held to the bike with nothing but paint. Made to be hung in a garage until put out for the garbage man.
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Old 08-21-19, 03:41 PM
  #64  
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mmmmhh, I got a Free Spirit from 1980-1982 and I can tell it is a tank! Only downside is the rust prone steel parts, and no way my bike has a one piece crank but all parts can be replaced, including crank arms etc. The stem shifters work great and nothig ever breaks loose or makes weird noises, even for being an old steel frame bike, it's fast.
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Old 08-21-19, 04:35 PM
  #65  
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Pacific, Next, Hyper, Magna, Roadmaster, in the bottom of worst bikes ever. I cringe everytime I see someone specially kids getting excited when buying one of these hunk of junk bikes at Walmart, Target, or defunct Kmart. Huffy makes some junk too but actually they did some decent bikes such as my 2002 Arlington hybrid bike which turned out to be my first adult size bike, it's heavy but good looking, good entry level derailleurs, but the only downside of it are it's phony plastic chrome painted crank arms, one of them developed a crack but i had put some good epoxy glue to fill the crack and worked perfectly. Not to mention, they did really good bikes back before 1975 and they also invented the "muscle bike" in the 60's. Schwinn and Mongoose also made some really crappy bikes and some other good ones but I wouldn't get me anything from them unless it's either of their most expensive models. many guys here mentioned the Free Spirit bikes from the 70's, 80's, lol, many of them were really nice decent bikes, like my 80-83 FS10 which came with decent Falcon parts, and tank-like steel frame, has been really really a good looking and nice bike.
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Old 08-21-19, 05:09 PM
  #66  
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Any bike with a shortish wheelbase. My former bicycle, a Breezer Citizen, was short...it felt like a trick circus bike.
The longer the wheelbase, the more Buick-like the ride.
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Old 08-21-19, 07:31 PM
  #67  
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Originally Posted by cycleheimer
OK. This is a true "C&V" thread (i.e., old). I posted to it 10 years ago. Good one, though. I remember the worst part of dealing with low-end bikes "back in the day" (Murray, most Huffy bikes, AMF, Columbia, Kia, Sears, some Ross bikes, Iverson, Power King, a few Raleighs, etc.) was trying to true the wheels. The walls of the steel rims weaved in and out, and the things never came out of the factory properly laced. Add to this curb jumping by kids, and you could understand why your local bike mechanic had a bottle of booze hidden near his work bench. I also was shocked by the way manufacturers crimped the seat and chain stays around the stamped drop outs. Extra long brake and gear cables fastened with plastic clips also caused my jaw to drop. Improperly aligned stays and forks, cheap decals, paint applied to bare metal without a primer, white metal anchor bolts that broke when you tightened them, etc. I can still remember how much the junk bikes made me appreciate well made (and indestructable) bikes like Schwinns were. Then I fell in love with mid-range Fujis, and similar Japanese bikes
You just reminded me of so many things I forgot about. It was about the time that made in Japan was a thing to be scorned.
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Old 08-21-19, 10:08 PM
  #68  
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It was anything made by Huffy, Murray, AMF etc from the 70s to the late 80s and into the 90s, when they all went under or outsourced to Asia. Oh, let's not forget All-Pro. It was a long downhill struggle in cost cutting. Just kept getting worse and worse. Spot welded mild steel monstrosities. By the end they were not even rideable. We joke about hi-ten steel bikes being "muffler pipe". Nope, hi ten steel is a quite good material. These bike really were muffler pipe or worse -- that bad.

Firenze - they looked at first like they might not be too bad, but they were worse than bad. I recall arguing with the shop owner about whether we should work on them. No way to make them safe.
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Old 08-22-19, 02:08 AM
  #69  
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Originally Posted by Salamandrine
It was a long downhill struggle in cost cutting. Just kept getting worse and worse.
From what I've gathered this seems to have been a common tactic with most industries at the time.

It's one of the reasons why the US has to import most of its high-quality steel from Asia and Europe nowadays. (Source) Or why US cars can only compete in the US as they simply don't stand up to its overseas competitors.

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Old 08-22-19, 03:43 AM
  #70  
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Old 08-22-19, 06:33 AM
  #71  
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Originally Posted by cycleheimer
old Chiordas from the '70s,
I have one of those. I like it. Works like a charm.
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Old 08-22-19, 06:45 AM
  #72  
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I remember years ago a friend came over on an AMF gaspipe number. I was kinda excited, never had seen one before. He let me check it out; I went to pick it up(one handed)as one would and started laughing when it didn't leave the ground.I did lift it a few inches and it had to be the heaviest bike I ever picked up. I feel sorry for any car unlucky enough to hit it, as it trudges along crushing the ground.
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Old 08-22-19, 11:16 AM
  #73  
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Go get urself a low rider bike or a stretched frame one lol
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Old 08-22-19, 11:26 AM
  #74  
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Well, US cars, maybe mostly those from FCA cannot compete since they're junk afilliated to italian junk. Italian bikes are beautifully made, that doesn't mean high end exotics are reliable whatsoever only for looking nice. That was true statement until the late 90's, but nowadays most US cars are of better quality or in pair with foreign brands, while some asian brands and some euro brands have turned to crappy unreliable expensive crap. It's like saying Trek, Cannondale or Gary Fisher are subpar quality of their foreign counterparts..
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Old 08-22-19, 11:57 AM
  #75  
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Originally Posted by Homebrew01
Another C. Itoh vote. Those things they made in the 70s were horrible.
Add me to that list. I have memories of a rear derailleur, trimmed in red, that looked like a horrid copy of a Huret Svelto. They showed up in the shop for "can you tune it up?" service regularly and a can opener bolted to the dropout would have shifted better.
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