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Saying yes sir and yes ma’am

Old 11-02-19, 05:01 PM
  #226  
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Originally Posted by no motor? View Post
Nurse insert name here is the way I understand it.
I rescind what a said when I said call her Honey Buns. She might be nurse Ratched.

https://tenor.com/view/nurses-nurse-gif-4118923
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Old 11-02-19, 05:02 PM
  #227  
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Originally Posted by no motor? View Post
Nurse insert name here is the way I understand it.
One of my nurses has tattoos. She frightens me.

As for the NP, nurse is appropriate. That's how they refer to themselves. She did call me by my first name once, but I corrected her. Especially since I've always only referred to her respectfully, and she never made any gesture to change that.

Last edited by KraneXL; 11-02-19 at 05:49 PM. Reason: word correct
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Old 11-02-19, 05:19 PM
  #228  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
One of my nurses has tattoos. She frightens me.

As the the NP, nurse is appropriate. That's how they refer to themselves. She did call me by my first name once, but I corrected her. Especially since I've always only referred to her respectfully, and she never made any gesture to change that.
Correct this nurse

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Old 11-02-19, 11:00 PM
  #229  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
One of my nurses has tattoos. She frightens me.

As for the NP, nurse is appropriate. That's how they refer to themselves. She did call me by my first name once, but I corrected her. Especially since I've always only referred to her respectfully, and she never made any gesture to change that.
Did she pronounce your first name incorrectly?
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Old 11-02-19, 11:05 PM
  #230  
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Originally Posted by himespau View Post
I'm sort of confused with that because I recently got a new primary care provider and she's a nurse practitioner. What's the appropriate title to address her?
"Susan", "Melissa", "Jane", "Carol", "Yu Yan", "Chen", "Li", "Deepa", "Mythri", "Ananya" ... or whatever her name is.
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Old 11-03-19, 01:49 AM
  #231  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
Did she pronounce your first name incorrectly?
She inappropriately assumed a casual posture with me. The corrections was a reminder to her that she was a paid professional, and that was the nature of our relationship.

Last edited by KraneXL; 11-03-19 at 01:53 AM.
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Old 11-03-19, 03:05 AM
  #232  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
She inappropriately assumed a casual posture with me. The corrections was a reminder to her that she was a paid professional, and that was the nature of our relationship.

I can almost guarantee you've made some "customer of the day" lists. But it kinda sounds like you set out to accomplish that.


How did you refer to her?
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Old 11-03-19, 09:14 AM
  #233  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
She inappropriately assumed a casual posture with me. The corrections was a reminder to her that she was a paid professional, and that was the nature of our relationship.
Krane XL at Home Depot Dude you are too uptight


Last edited by Hondo Gravel; 11-03-19 at 09:28 AM. Reason: Rosetta Stoned
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Old 11-03-19, 10:15 AM
  #234  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
"Susan", "Melissa", "Jane", "Carol", "Yu Yan", "Chen", "Li", "Deepa", "Mythri", "Ananya" ... or whatever her name is.
Yeah, more of the question is when someone asks me who my primary care doctor is do I just let it slide and say her name? Do I correct them and say she's a nurse practitioner (as if that's a lesser thing, but what if they're also nurses, did I just offend their profession...) rather than a doctor?

As it is she got all offended when I asked her if we really needed to keep meeting to discuss a medical issue I was having since I was also meeting with the surgeon who had just performed surgery to correct that issue. And then got all hot and bothered when I declined to retake some medical tests that had had normal values 1 month prior (and immediately prior to the surgery), but were out of whack post surgery. Yep, I was on the table for 6 hours without a transfusion less than 24 hours before they took a blood test, are you really surprised that I was anemic? And by that point, I hadn't eaten in 36 hours, is it surprising that my glucose levels were out of the normal parameters? One day prior, they'd both been just fine.

Since she is in charge of my medical experience, I'd prefer not to piss her off further (it was bad enough that post surgery, I'd been cared for by a nurse who was a former student - and made it clear that she hadn't enjoyed or done well in my course).
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Old 11-03-19, 10:54 AM
  #235  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
I can almost guarantee you've made some "customer of the day" lists. But it kinda sounds like you set out to accomplish that.
How did you refer to her?
This thread reminds me that some people like to focus on themselves and their own, presumably negative, experiences. They can feel validated by receiving attention and sympathy. They aren’t looking to solve anything….they simply want validation.
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us to decide which ones we want to choose and feed”… Pema Chodron
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Old 11-03-19, 12:01 PM
  #236  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
I can almost guarantee you've made some "customer of the day" lists. But it kinda sounds like you set out to accomplish that.

How did you refer to her?
Respectfully, something I've always done from the time I was taught it as a child. And I accept nothing less in return. Which is what surprised me. I'm still not entirely sure if she did it because she didn't know if any better (a testament to her poor training) or simple because she was just being disrespectful.

Last edited by KraneXL; 11-03-19 at 06:22 PM.
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Old 11-03-19, 12:08 PM
  #237  
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Originally Posted by Hondo Gravel View Post
When I traveled to Canada to see Banff and Jasper NP. I studied what was considered polite or rude in Canada. Being close to Mexico I know what is considered polite. Just read up on the culture you will be visiting and if you have any sense you will be OK.
Jasper and Banff have been on my list forever. The Rockies just get nicer the further north you go.
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Old 11-03-19, 04:48 PM
  #238  
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Originally Posted by Hondo Gravel View Post
One of the best films ever. A great criticism of the psychiatric medical practices of the time.
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Old 11-03-19, 08:02 PM
  #239  
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
Jasper and Banff have been on my list forever. The Rockies just get nicer the further north you go.
You haven't been?
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Old 11-03-19, 08:09 PM
  #240  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
Respectfully, something I've always done from the time I was taught it as a child. And I accept nothing less in return. Which is what surprised me. I'm still not entirely sure if she did it because she didn't know if any better (a testament to her poor training) or simple because she was just being disrespectful.
But what did you say?

"Hey ... you!"
"Julie ... could you check my IV?"
"Nurse! Nurse!"


She probably called you by name because that's what we're taught nowadays. Make service personal and refer to people by their first names. That way people feel more relaxed and comfortable. This is especially important in stressful circumstances, like medical situations.



https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1414453

"RESULTS:
When meeting a physician for the first time, 45 percent of the respondents wanted to be called by their first names, 29 percent preferred last names, and 26 percent found either approach acceptable. When being addressed by a physician with whom they were already well acquainted, 78 percent favored given names, and only 6 percent chose surnames. Preferences varied little with age of the patient or with age or sex of the physician."
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Old 11-03-19, 10:03 PM
  #241  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
But what did you say?

"Hey ... you!"
Does that sound professional to you?
"Julie ... could you check my IV?" "Nurse! Nurse!"
Referring to them by title is never inappropriate.

She probably called you by name because that's what we're taught nowadays. Make service personal and refer to people by their first names. That way people feel more relaxed and comfortable. This is especially important in stressful circumstances, like medical situations.
A common misconception. After 20 years in the hotel industry and more than half a million patrons from all over the world I can count the number of those that requested to be addressed by their first name on one hand. People may answer one way on a poll but in reality they behave quite the opposite.



https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1414453

"RESULTS:
When meeting a physician for the first time, 45 percent of the respondents wanted to be called by their first names, 29 percent preferred last names, and 26 percent found either approach acceptable. When being addressed by a physician with whom they were already well acquainted, 78 percent favored given names, and only 6 percent chose surnames. Preferences varied little with age of the patient or with age or sex of the physician."
Of that group how many do you think refer to their doctor by his first name? And how many of those doctors do you think request it? Personally, I've never in my life had my doctor ask me to refer to him by his first name. Have you?

Using first names is not a decision you arbitrarily get to make (save co-workers, classmates, etc.), it is one you are granted by the person you're dealing with.

I also find it unlikely that you don't know these things since references to major cultures such as the U.S. is readily available. For example, I know documentaries that the Japanese bow when they greet each other. What do you think of that?
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Old 11-04-19, 02:27 AM
  #242  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
Personally, I've never in my life had my doctor ask me to refer to him by his first name. Have you?
I refer to my Dr by her first name and she calls me my first name. I can't think of a medical person I don't refer to by first name.

In the beginning I might call the Dr ... Dr FirstName.



Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
I know documentaries that the Japanese bow when they greet each other. What do you think of that?
When I'm in Japan, I turn and bow when I leave the stores.

Here, I do the “Namaste” bow with some of my fellow students and a slight nod to others.

Some Australians kiss on each cheek to greet or say good-bye.

I'll wave and nod (and sometimes actually say "Thank you") when I get off the bus.
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Old 11-04-19, 06:51 AM
  #243  
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Originally Posted by Seattle Forrest View Post
For sure treating people like equals is confused and muddled.
Not all people are equals, first off. Plus there are various dimensions to human relationships, even in "brief transactions". Maybe you've never considered this?

There are physical and other capability inequalities, and these are recognized generally, and specifically within application of the law. Example, use of deadly force when confronted by someone of superior physical ability (younger, larger, man on woman, etc.)

There are role inequalities that are established by convention. Example, follow instructions of first responders in a crisis. They're the experts and you're in the way. Or show your hands when a police officer tells you to. This is common sense.

There are moral superiorities, such as the poster tried to blur into the discussion (poorly) by mentioning how one might treat a murderer. That was a muddled example, however. Moral superiority such as when one encounters someone who has endured suffering with grace or has sacrificed his/her life for the safety of others. These are acknowledged by others.

Then, there are structural inequalities conferred by rank. Examples include in the military, in the Law (judges), and in most every employment situation.

So "treating others as equals" works in only a subset of human interactions. Forcing it where it's not due only leads to confusion or worse. That's why the thinking was muddled, even if weakly well intentioned.
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Old 11-04-19, 07:04 AM
  #244  
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Yes, all people are equals... it is only their skills and learned abilities that differentiates them... any of which may NOT be in need at any particular time...

Hence, a homeless street bum, pulling a learned physician from a burning vehicle, still deserves a "thank you, sir."
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Old 11-04-19, 07:14 AM
  #245  
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There are a myriad of cultures and subcultures in this world. It is arrogant to assume your own conventions are more correct.
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Old 11-04-19, 10:10 AM
  #246  
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Originally Posted by genec View Post
Yes, all people are equals...
But what if the other person doesn't agree with this. What if he/she thinks that he/she is not your equal. Are you justified to push your equalistic agenda to other people Isn't that the kind of thing that flies in the face of modern woke culture and everything that they so dearly hold on to?
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Old 11-04-19, 10:21 AM
  #247  
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P&R in 3...2...
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Old 11-04-19, 01:47 PM
  #248  
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Originally Posted by KraneXL View Post
...Of that group how many do you think refer to their doctor by his first name? And how many of those doctors do you think request it? Personally, I've never in my life had my doctor ask me to refer to him by his first name. Have you?
I'm going to agree 100% with this. The way I was raised is that a doctor is referred to as "Doctor So-and-so". Always. "Good morning, Doctor." "Yes, Doctor." It is a distinguishing title for which the recognition is both front-and-center and well justified.

Just as a Judge is "Judge So-and-so". "Good evening, Judge and Mrs. Smales. It's a pleasure to see you."

The fellow who does my landscaping is a terrific professional. And he's younger than I am. He prefers his given name, and that's how he advertises on his trucks. So I honor this and call him by his first name. I would gladly have called him "Mr. So-and-so", if that had been his preference. And that is how he addresses me, formally. That's okay. I'm his customer.
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Old 11-04-19, 04:46 PM
  #249  
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Originally Posted by RubeRad View Post
P&R in 3...2...
Nah, not worth my time... clearly not my equal.
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Old 11-04-19, 05:13 PM
  #250  
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Originally Posted by Machka View Post
You haven't been?
Vancouver is as far north as I've made it. So far.
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