folder fanatic

For transport to the hospital in an emergency, my father had the paramedics do just that. Taking him home was next to impossible. It occured during the last transit strike. My mother was so desperate in getting him home, she literally had to drag the neighbor from his house since his wife decided that she did not want her husband to do it. After that, I always keep my bikes at the ready to go anywhere, my sister moved back with her car, and I make it a point to talk in a limited way with the neighbors. I keep the peace in that way and I will stay independent and know who my "friends" are (nobody around here-most good people moved away years ago).

noteon 

Better get a Jet Ski, too. That way if the asteroid strike comes around Fresno, you can get to Catalina.

Torrilin

Well you see, when the 2 year old is a severe asthmatic with triggers that include emotional distress, exercise (walking counts) and mold and you live on the Atlantic seaboard... you'd better have a way to carry her. And her medications. And all the normal toddler stuff. Because odds are good she'll be exposed to an asthma trigger when she's out, and you need a way to calm her down and get the attack under control. That trigger list is my sister's, not mine thank god... one of the very natural and healthy responses to an asthma attack is panic. That counts for the "emotional distress" trigger, so for a long time, any attack would be far more severe than one for a more ordinary asthmatic. It would also take far longer to resolve, since just trying to breathe would keep fueling the attack. She had a very sensible aversion to exercise that would trigger her, and it took a long time for her lungs to get large enough that walking wasn't a problem. (mercifully for my mother, my trigger list is even stranger and it's *very* hard to expose me to them... good thing since I'm allergic to some of the standard asthma treatments)

Like most people, parents try different techniques for getting around. If a parent thinks a stroller is a good idea, I'm *not* arguing with them. They know their child better than I do. I may not *like* kids, but that is largely because I know that they're people and my introvert self doesn't handle lots of people well. And well... people vary. A lot.

FXjohn

Torrilin

Heh. A lot of why my sister is still alive and a fairly healthy adult is that my parents didn't try to protect her from life. They gave her help and support for the hard parts (like being 2), and didn't let her get away with much. She's now busy trying to wear out her first adult bike .

(Amazing how much better exercise induced asthma gets when you have big enough lungs and a good treatment plan)

Gustavo

I don't know where you live, but it doesn't sound like I'd want to live there. Aren't you being a bit too pessimistic? Do you really think that the future has to be THAT bad? Isn't there always a chance to go to college, if you want them to? I know college is very expensive over there, but if you start saving now, it shouldn't be too difficult to manage in 17 years or so. And you don't need to go to college to be a good person, or to get an honest job...

folder fanatic

To go to college in the US means that you must mortgage your future away with very high student loans-unless you plan ahead with savings or are very wealthy. My parents thought that student loans was acceptable-and did not take out anything extra (mortgage the house, take an extra job, etc.) for my education. I do not as being the one who is saddled with the debt. I thought that was very selfish and hypercritical of them as they still believe (and had) children for taking care of them in their old age, servants, etc. I simply took a hard, close look at why people (my parents included) had children, and it was not a pretty sight. I did not have a nice life in a good solid world, so why should I subject a child-or children. to this mess? To perpetuate the problem down through the ages is not the answer. I chose to stop the tragedy from happening over and over again for someone else's gain. And the worshipping of the college degree over and beyond what is simply was created for-a nice critical thought education, not a job training center-is that I observed in college. I stopped the family tragedy from continuing.

And the employment system also uses a college degree as a weeding tool (at no expense to the company)
to channel and hire or not people into most any decent paying job. The big question here is "do I or have I missed out on the joys of child rearing? Perhaps. When children are small (before puberty), everybody just loves them. They get free or donated stuff from both public and private charities. But once they reach the teen years, that's it. They become another adult to deal with and saddled with problems. And the parent(s)-if they are available-are the ones who face being charged with something their minor children have done or when they reach adulthood, pick up the pieces of mistakes the children have. I sleep at night now very well.

noteon 

Congratulations.

So did I.

jamesdenver

I like having control in/of my life. I know it sounds weird but I don't like the unknown variable factors of having kids. No matter how great a parent I know I could be I'd still be frightened my kids would turn out to be like this.

acroy

2yr old, one on the way, and car-lite.

Artkansas 

They're like sooo amoral. Their anger at the victims was almost funny. I hope they represent a small portion of the population.

And they didn't even get to keep the money they stole! That's so outrageous.