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Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2

Old 03-05-21, 07:53 AM
  #15851  
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Keeps having these recurring dreams where he's back in high school wearing the Sans-a-belt 100 % polyester pants he wore for those 7 years and didn't study for the big test. Then he remembers that schooling and pants weren't for him and headed for the life by the river, in a free candy van.
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Old 03-05-21, 08:08 AM
  #15852  
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Refuses to give up on his dream of his former inmates and him opening up a farm together, and naming it Con Seed.
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Old 03-05-21, 11:03 AM
  #15853  
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Wanted to open a discount lie store called Con Cents.
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Old 03-05-21, 12:20 PM
  #15854  
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...in what his therapist describes in his notes as a "major breakthrough in adherence to societal norms," he has begun wearing a second face mask when unable to maintain social distancing. This second mask covers his privates. He tries very hard to not get the two masks confused, when removing and then redonning them.
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Old 03-05-21, 02:35 PM
  #15855  
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being the impulsive jokester he is, he decided one morning to shave his head continuously around to match his unibrow. furthering his impulse, he will have his face tattooed on the back of his head and then, just like himself, people won't know exactly whether he's coming or going

to confuse matters more, he's contemplating an unparalleled uni-stache. oh, the implications
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Old 03-05-21, 02:47 PM
  #15856  
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...teaching his dog to walk backwards was not as hard as he thought it would be.
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Old 03-05-21, 02:57 PM
  #15857  
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building a fixed gear to further his unibrow agenda. he knows it's gonna hurt until he learns not to crash going backwards, but that's the price you pay for uni-dreams
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Old 03-05-21, 04:49 PM
  #15858  
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He was feeling Blue today and that dog bit him on the arm.
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Old 03-05-21, 05:05 PM
  #15859  
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Still wonders how they sold so many copies of Kind of Blue when there aren't any words to the songs.
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Old 03-05-21, 05:30 PM
  #15860  
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Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
He was feeling Blue today and that dog bit him on the arm.
last night at karaoke, he reached for opie's snack pouch. omg!! opie snapped like a rabid possum biting his arm and then went for his face. it was horrific!! fortunately, ahsposo had not trimmed his unibrow in a while foiling opie's razor sharp teeth. it took over an hour to separate them from the gross entanglement. but, on the bright side, they got to know each other so much better. on the dark side, opie's develop a taste for unibrows!!
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Old 03-05-21, 05:34 PM
  #15861  
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Originally Posted by no motor? View Post
Still wonders how they sold so many copies of Kind of Blue when there aren't any words to the songs.
still wonders why there weren't any words to the song, so he decided make up his own....every time he listens to it. so, sometimes it's kinda blue, sometimes kinda yellow. and, sometimes, kinda rainbow...if you know what i mean

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Old 03-05-21, 08:24 PM
  #15862  
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...the hardest part of the whole thing was getting his dog to sit still while he shaved its ass.
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Old 03-05-21, 08:47 PM
  #15863  
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Can't tell who is more handsome, thook or his dog's ass...
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Old 03-05-21, 09:15 PM
  #15864  
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...he's not one to be judgmental.
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Old 03-05-21, 10:21 PM
  #15865  
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he can't decide, so they both look the same to him. what does that say about the dog's ass? hmmm....or me
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Old 03-05-21, 10:47 PM
  #15866  
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...the important thing is that his dog looks a lot better to him now.
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Old 03-05-21, 10:51 PM
  #15867  
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is thinking.....ohhh yeah...nuttin' like a shaved ass
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Old 03-06-21, 06:28 AM
  #15868  
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Has taken manscaping to new levels, all of them new lows.
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Old 03-06-21, 07:50 AM
  #15869  
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Can't stop using vowels; he uses them all - a, e, i, o and u,

Sometimes he even uses y.
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Old 03-06-21, 08:05 AM
  #15870  
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Has taken out numerous loans,in his quest of buying vowels.
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Old 03-06-21, 10:26 AM
  #15871  
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There's a picture in today's edition of the New York Post of him parading around Acapulco dressed only in a diphthong.
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Old 03-06-21, 10:33 AM
  #15872  
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...has invested heavily in the new virtual currency, Bitthong. "With these virtual currency scams, you need to get in there while it's still riding up," he advises.
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Old 03-06-21, 11:05 AM
  #15873  
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...until the recent discovery of a glowing, 6 foot long shark off the coast of New Zealand, he held the title of Earth's largest, bioluminescent, vertebrate.
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Old 03-06-21, 12:47 PM
  #15874  
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He's not saying "Aliens !", but aliens.

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Old 03-06-21, 02:18 PM
  #15875  
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where the love boat meets castaway meets fantasy island....in the bermuda triangle. he lost his mind weeks ago....and wilson....so now he just calls everything wilson

Last edited by thook; 03-06-21 at 04:54 PM.
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