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-   -   Spouses (https://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php?t=1287043)

andrewclaus 12-30-23 09:09 AM

Spouses
 
Does anyone else here regularly ride with a "long term" spouse? I'm going riding again today with my wife of 40 years. We've been riding together for almost 43 years. Cycling was at the root of our relationship, and still is. She was the first woman I met when I was dating who took cycling seriously. Her bike was better than mine, but that's not saying much--mine was a Schwinn Continental!

We started touring together right after getting married in 1983. (She bought me a better bike as a wedding present.) We've crossed the US together, and had lengthy bike tours in Europe and NZ. (We've also hiked the Colorado Trail, Appalachian Trail, and Pacific Crest Trail.) We both commuted (separately) by bike during our working years. We share a car, which gets used about once a week. Yesterday we did a Costco haul on the bikes, the major use nowadays for the touring packs.

Extra points if you ride a tandem! Not for us--we have problems sharing a canoe.

skidder 12-30-23 09:11 AM

Sorry, I can't help you. I've never had one of those things you call a "spouse."

andrewclaus 12-30-23 09:13 AM


Originally Posted by skidder (Post 23114501)
Sorry, I can't help you. I've never had one of those things you call a "spouse."

A bachelor--"A man who never made the same mistake once."

jadmt 12-30-23 09:30 AM

while I have only been with my wife for ~35 years she was only an occasional rec bike rider. she however has put about half a million miles on the back of my motorcycles with me..rarely complaining and has spent literally 100's of hours sitting next to me in a jeep doing some insane trails and sleeping on the ground in freezing weather....with nary a complaint....she is a keeper.

Carbonfiberboy 12-30-23 12:16 PM

50 years together, but only riding seriously together - on a tandem - since '07. Getting there was a long and interesting process, at least to us. I'll talk a little about it as it might be of interest to others.

When I met her, my future wife was seriously asthmatic and couldn't walk between 1st and 2nd in downtown Seattle without stopping to catch her breath a couple times. If you're not familiar with Seattle, that's probably an 18% grade. I wanted her go be a permanent life partner and I've always been an outdoor kind of guy so of course I had to fix that. I'm an engineer type, so I fix stuff. She was totally amenable. No fun being asthmatic. We started with short neighborhood walks and over the months worked up to trail hiking. After a year or so of that, I took her above 5000' in the Cascades and she was hooked for life. If you want to see God, just go up there 'cause that's where she lives.

We gradually increased our hiking until we were doing yearly 10-day unsupported backpacks in the mountains. That went on until I turned 50 and realized that I was starting to need more regular exercise, so we both bought bikes. She only rode on MUPs while I restarted road riding. She had maybe half my watts, so riding together wasn't an option for a while, but she gradually got stronger so that we could ride our singles together. That ended when she got run over.by a 1-ton flatbed. After that, she was too terrified to ride her single on the road, so she went back to the MUPs.

I'd been doing Sunday group rides with a fun group for about 10 years by then, so I suggested that we buy a tandem and then both ride with the group. She said, "I can't keep up with you." I replied, "On the back of my bike you can." After a couple years of doing weekday rides on the tandem, we did our first group ride and she was hooked. So that's how we coped with being two different people who both liked the same thing, particularly being together.

rumrunn6 12-30-23 12:32 PM

over 3 decades & we still ride together, but I mostly ride alone

JoeyBike 12-30-23 12:35 PM


Originally Posted by andrewclaus (Post 23114500)
Does anyone else here regularly ride with a "long term" spouse?

My wife and I met as speed skaters (inline skates, not ice). She hates riding bikes. After many years she was diagnosed with osteopenia. Decided that broken bones weren't worth the risk. So now we are hiking buddies. She's a die hard gym rat, I still skate (and cycle of course). So we do our own thing, then meet up for stuff we enjoy together.

Nice question!

ASIDE:
We met late in life, in our 40s, never married before. Now we're well past 25 years together. Both were dedicated single people with zero desire to have a "second opinion" we had to respect all the time. We both dated A LOT before we met. We practiced being married for 16 years then figured why not. So far, so good. I will admit, given the number of people we both "test rode" before we met - for all of you dedicated bachelors and bachelorettes, the odds of finding that special person is NOT good. So keep being happy single as we both thought would be our fate.

RCMoeur 12-30-23 12:36 PM

Prior to meeting my wife, I dated within the bike club, which didn't go well (for me, anyway) as they typically dumped me for someone faster or more interesting.

I met my wife online in 1995, just before the Internet. She had never ridden a bike when I met her, so the good news was she had no bad habits, but I did teach her how to ride. We got his & hers cruisers and upgraded them a bit, and we put many miles on them (mine now has over 21,000 miles).

We rented a Santana tandem from a local shop and rode the weekly club ride across town on a 105° summer day. The spokes in the rear wheel started coming loose, and she was hot, tired, chafed, sweaty, and altogether miserable. After a shower, snacks, and some rest, she then asked: "When are we getting one?" Yes, we still have the Santana Vision we bought a couple weeks later and put several thousands of miles on in many memorable places.

Unfortunately, her knees have deteriorated and therapy hasn't been all that successful, and for the moment she's not a candidate for replacements. But the tandem, her cruiser, and her Townie patiently await when she can ride again.

jon c. 12-30-23 01:21 PM

I rode a great deal as a teen but then abandoned the bike. Decades later I came to live in a rural area popular with cyclists. But it never occurred to me to try riding again until my wife suggested we get bikes.

We did and I loved it. She enjoyed it but didn't really develop a passion and after a few years her interest waned. So I have her to thank for getting me back on the bike but unfortunately her bike has sat idle for the last few years.

zandoval 12-30-23 01:35 PM

I rode once with a spouse once... Yep...


https://cimg9.ibsrv.net/gimg/bikefor...75e3729f4.jpeg

downtube42 12-30-23 01:36 PM

I think it's fairly accurate to say my wife rode bikes with me long enough to ensure I was fully caught, landed, battered, and cooked. Now she knits.

Our shared activity is hiking.

gobicycling 12-30-23 04:41 PM

A devastating year. We will have been married 60 years this coming July. Over that time, between raising two sons, one with profound developmental and physical disabilities, the other with total paralysis from a sports injury, we have found time to bike together. Even doing centuries where I did the century and she did a shorter route. This year has been devastating in that she has developed some severe and difficult medical complications that have kept her off the bicycle at 86 years old. We don't know the prognosis and whether she will get through this or not. In the meantime I get very short rides in and we do some walking together. I'm also swimming and she hopes to get back in the pool as things improve. I suppose that's all a result of aging, but it's sure hard for her and me to take.
(Andy died 7 years ago, Tim is a highly successful attorney who, along with his attorney wife, have a thriving civil rights legal firm.)

freeranger 12-31-23 07:46 AM

Married for 37 years and my wife rides with me, both on and off road. 20 years ago, when we lived in northeast MD, we mainly rode trails, mtn.bike trails from mild to wild, and rail-trails in MD. and southeastern PA, didn't own road bikes. Bought road bikes after moving, as no great number of off-road trails, and ones that do exist are a bit of a drive. Thought about moving back, but not in the cards.

Chuck M 12-31-23 08:05 AM


Originally Posted by jon c. (Post 23114685)
I rode a great deal as a teen but then abandoned the bike. Decades later I came to live in a rural area popular with cyclists. But it never occurred to me to try riding again until my wife suggested we get bikes.

We did and I loved it. She enjoyed it but didn't really develop a passion and after a few years her interest waned. So I have her to thank for getting me back on the bike but unfortunately her bike has sat idle for the last few years.

This. But with omitting the sentence about moving to a rural area.

Hermes 12-31-23 08:10 AM

Married 52 years and riding tandems since 1980. We train and race together including team time trial, team pursuit at the track. My wife has raced team pursuit with me and two other men. In 2022, she set the hour record for her age group 38.6 Km besting the previous record by 500 meters. We have lost interest in the tandem and prefer to ride together on road or track bikes.

Tahiti.
https://cimg9.ibsrv.net/gimg/bikefor...193fb5d5d.jpeg

20km team time trial.

https://cimg7.ibsrv.net/gimg/bikefor...7c40261a9.jpeg

Mallorca Spain and one of the rare pics of me leading a climb.
https://cimg5.ibsrv.net/gimg/bikefor...ab8cd7577.jpeg

rsbob 12-31-23 11:15 AM

Met my wife online and one of the major draws besides intelligence and humor was that she was an avid cyclist (downhill skier and hiker) and enjoyed the same routes I did. After we moved in together and eventually married, we rode our single bikes together but the disparity in power was a bit much for her, so we got a tandem. We rode our tandem for many years, and enjoyed her desire to chase people down who passed us (yes she is competitive) and the downhill speeds we could hit. Then she had a knee replacement and had back issues and the tandem and her single racing bike were out. Now she rides an e-bike and can thrash me on climbs (turnabout is fair play?). I mostly ride by myself but enjoy riding together a more leisurely and scenic pace. She rides by herself a bit too and uses her indoor trainer several days a week.

Alan K 12-31-23 01:10 PM

When I saw the title in plural, my first thought was that is it going to be a thread about Mormons confessing. ;)

My spouse always enjoyed swimming more than bicycling so in our early years together, we did both things but as the decades rolled along, I continued bicycling and she started cutting back on it. To get her interested again, several years ago I suggested we by a Ti tandem that was advertised locally, in perfect condition, and in our size. But she didn’t want me to buy it.
She has some joint issues so her lack of ‘interest’ is related to health reasons. I do wish she didn’t have this problem… it could have been so much more fun.

She is an avid gardener..

Speedway2 12-31-23 02:07 PM

I think it's fantastic that a husband & wife can do recreational activities together!
However, there are some activities I prefer to do without her.....eg. golfing, because it's with the "guys". I'll cycle with her sometimes but she just can't keep up the pace. Now that I have a BMX we might go on more casual rides.....besides I prefer to ride my Single Speeds and alone.

John E 12-31-23 06:07 PM

Before we were married, I put Peugeot UO-18-style upright bars and wider-range gears on my old Bianchi and removed the "toe traps" (her terminology). Bicycles were our transportation during our college years, including the first three (1973-76) years of our marriage. (We were eking out a living on my graduate fellowship, part-time jobs in electronics and bicycle repair, and her substitute teacher pay.) She still likes bicycling on trails, but she has been intimidated by automobile traffic for a long time, so almost all of my riding is solo.

13ollocks 01-01-24 09:03 PM


Originally Posted by andrewclaus (Post 23114500)
Does anyone else here regularly ride with a "long term" spouse? I'm going riding again today with my wife of 40 years. We've been riding together for almost 43 years. Cycling was at the root of our relationship, and still is. She was the first woman I met when I was dating who took cycling seriously. Her bike was better than mine, but that's not saying much--mine was a Schwinn Continental!

We started touring together right after getting married in 1983. (She bought me a better bike as a wedding present.) We've crossed the US together, and had lengthy bike tours in Europe and NZ. (We've also hiked the Colorado Trail, Appalachian Trail, and Pacific Crest Trail.) We both commuted (separately) by bike during our working years. We share a car, which gets used about once a week. Yesterday we did a Costco haul on the bikes, the major use nowadays for the touring packs.

Extra points if you ride a tandem! Not for us--we have problems sharing a canoe.

Nope - I bought my then-girlfriend a new bike in 1993. She got a flat on the first ride together - we got home and she parked it out on the balcony, where it stayed. That bloody bike followed us through marriage, several moves, kids, until I finally cleaned it up ~ 20 years later and gave it away. My Missus is definitely not a cyclist (she used to commute by bike in high school and college, and never saw it as anything by utilitarian transport, not "fun"). However, in >35 years, she has never complained about my long hours on the bike (although she's happy to gently mock my "MAMIL-ness"), so I guess I'm pretty lucky :)

Russ Roth 01-01-24 10:12 PM

We often ride in separate circles but sometimes ride together and do extended rides together. When we met 19 years ago she talked about having a good bike, a 250.00 nishiki mtb from the LBS and we did some small rides together. I kept encouraging her in her rides and made sure I didn't just constantly show her how much faster than her I was. This year we have plans to do the local mtb triple crown which is around 50 miles of non-stop mtb riding through 3 connected parks some of which can be fairly hard. We'll try the VTXL which is just over 300 miles and 3k feet of climbing which we hope to do in 4 days, either way we'll bail on day 4 since its all we can designate for the effort and we're hopeful to do the Super8 in VT as well. But most of her riding will be with friends or the kids while most of mine will be solo, with the kids, or trailing the oldest's cycling group as a sag assist. The oldest and I are planning century rides every couple weeks to get ready for some grand fondos this year.

Classtime 01-02-24 07:12 AM

Nope.
My wife is a runner and after I caused her to crash the second time, she was basically done. Recovering from a ride with me interfered with her running.

RB1-luvr 01-02-24 08:18 AM

I've never dated or been married to anyone who rides. I like cycling to be just mine.

Bob Ross 01-02-24 08:50 AM

My wife is actually the person who first got me interested in recreational group riding! I had been primarily a "utility cyclist" for all my life, but she, on a whim, signed up to do the Boston>New York AIDS Ride in 1995 and loved the whole disciplined aspect of group riding that the local club provided as training opportunities for folks participating in that event. So she told me all about how fun cooperative pacelines are and yadda-yadda, eventully convinced me to join the local cycle club and try it out.

Only took her 10 years to convince me! (Seriously.)

But for the last ~18 years we've probably done 65-70% of our rides together. She's an awesome cyclist, definitely an asset to any paceline. Even when it's only a paceline of 2 cyclists.

Trsnrtr 01-02-24 04:33 PM

My wife and I have cycled together over 40 years. Even at 72, we have a combined yearly average of 11,000 to 12,000 miles.

The biggest problem with a cycling significant other is having to buy two of everything. :)


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