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DBA 08-15-14 08:43 AM

Has recently developed a flying monkey fetish.

skijor 08-15-14 09:33 AM

His Lying Call Center was relocated from D.C. to Shenzhen where he's known as Genius Liar.

ahsposo 08-15-14 07:24 PM

Not only does he save his used Cheez Whiz cans but I discovered he also has a hoard of empty Fart In A Can containers.

dynodonn 08-15-14 10:45 PM

Has a cellar stocked with cans of whoop ass for the upcoming zombie apocalypse.

3alarmer 08-15-14 11:12 PM

... collecting recipes for canned and potted meats for future use. His recipe for lady fingers came from "Preppers Quarterly: the magazine for survivors".

Wilfred Laurier 08-16-14 07:29 AM

every item in his wardrobe was selected
because of an article in
preppies monthly: the d bag handbook

Jseis 08-16-14 10:11 AM

Paces the backwoods trail with a d-bag on his shoulder and a smouldering pickup line, "Hey survivor, ready for a little prep time?".

dynodonn 08-16-14 10:41 AM

Still lives in his mom's basement, reading the latest issues of Zombie Rising.

ahsposo 08-16-14 06:37 PM

Actually hears the Music of the Spheres when he scratches his nuts.

"It's really celestial! I could do it all day but I have to work, you know." he told, a blog he supports.


Breaking News!

And is the only contributor! He is making pseudo contributions to the site it seems under false usernames (sockpuppets) like Dirty Dick, Wet Pecker, Saggy Sack, Dragon Acupple, bones_Mc, and turdles to increase his Google revenue!

3alarmer 08-17-14 09:55 AM

...never scratches his nuts. He much prefers playing a version of the Bach cello suite # 2 that has been transposed for sacks upon them.

3alarmer 08-17-14 09:58 AM

...there were no clean socks in the drawer when he awoke, so he had to use a couple of online ones to get dressed.

ahsposo 08-17-14 10:12 AM

Before he could shave his palm he went blind.

ahsposo 08-17-14 10:13 AM

Never tells one lie when two will do.

Wilfred Laurier 08-17-14 10:20 AM

always knows when he is lying

ahsposo 08-17-14 10:38 AM

Rumor has it that he will start typing only in capitals.

"I CAN NEITHER CONFIRM OR DENY THOSE RUMORS." his spokesperson said in a press conference at an undisclosed location.

dynodonn 08-17-14 11:15 AM

Is George W. Bush's love child.

black_box 08-17-14 12:29 PM

Recently found out he has a brother.

ahsposo 08-17-14 03:10 PM

He's a ruminant.

MillCreek 08-17-14 03:43 PM

Woke up this morning with a new pouch with a joey inside.

ahsposo 08-17-14 05:02 PM

Is a seething volcano of barely suppressed marsupial lust.

3alarmer 08-17-14 05:52 PM

...when stressed, he immediately drops prone on the ground and assumes the pouch position.

eschlwc 08-17-14 05:53 PM

just realized his time spent lying has surpassed all the time spent in any other life endeavour ... and he's ok with that.

[i'll think of a lie later.]

3alarmer 08-17-14 06:02 PM

Originally Posted by eschlwc (Post 17045895)

[i'll think of a lie later.]

...this is not the lie.

ahsposo 08-17-14 07:24 PM

Toothless they are not.

Quick they are.

Meaningful, relevant, and insightful.

Not wankers...

skijor 08-17-14 07:45 PM

Has pronoun trouble.

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