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Lead singer for The Man Blenders.
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Lead groupie for The Man Blenders.
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On a spaghetti and cupcake diet.
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Insists that all his food be pureed in a Vitamix.
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Loves the North Korean edition of Bicycling Magazine.
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Has a subscription to Playboy. It gives him issues, however.
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Nobody's fool on April 1st. The rest of year, he buys into anything.
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He demands a man cave with the finest Naugahyde seating.
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....as a young brave, he was the foremost Nauga hunter of the entire Snohomish nation. Now, he serves more as an elder statesman. |
Only friend he's ever had is the internet.
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His favorite friend was ordered from the Internet at fleshlig**.com.
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.....prefers his friends to be either imaginary or inflatable. Often, they seem to have a mixture of both elements. |
He's the reason those two letters are covered in *** on your screen.
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Smug.
Smug as a bug in a rug. |
Was a bug in a rug till he got squished. Now he's a oily spot on the rug.
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Drinks a drug from a jug in a slug or sips from a mug.
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Had all his bones removed so he can slide under doors.
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Built a cage with her bones.
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Harshes the buzz, wherever he goes.
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.....not buzzed all the time, wherever he goes. |
Has a nice, tight grasp on the essentials...
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....most definitely going as Justin Bieber this coming Halloween. |
Is taking the easy way out this Halloween by going as Father Time...
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waiting 'til june to try out all his hanukkah jokes.
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Lip synced his wedding vows.
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