Originally Posted by
3speed
...Once you have kids, they should come first in every life decision you make. Once you're a parent, you should no longer come first. If you decide to do this, it should be for them, not you. If it's not for them, you shouldn't do it.
I don't agree with this. While it "feels" right it creates two very negative scenarios.
1. You teach your children that becoming parents will end their dreams. From a young age we tell our kids they can dream, work towards goals etc... but if they have kids those dreams take a back seat. Sort of teaches them to see having kids as bad and something to be avoided.
2. Tells kids they are more important than their parents which can lead to a sense of entitlement. I cannot ever remember thinking my goals were "more important" than my parents and for the most part just went along with whatever they said we were doing.
Kids are resilient (if we teach them to be able to adapt) and will probably do ok if the parents pay attention to their needs, even in a more unconventional lifestyle. Frankly I wish my father had pursued some of his stated dreams a bit more rather than working a lot and then sitting on the couch. He had a long list of things he was going to do once he retired and died before that happened. Sometimes watching parents work towards a challenge teaches the child by example.