As someone who also has a high stack to reach ratio (though not as extreme as you), I learned to embrace headset spacers.
As you increase the effective stack with spacers, you also shorten the reach.
I did find it a little frustrating that most of the more upright bikes were touring bikes and that is not what I wanted.
I ended up on a Salsa Casseroll and then later a Soma Fog Cutter. Still needed a healthy dose of spacers.