It's counter-intuitive but sometimes you can increase your comfort by lowering/slamming the stem. If you can get the stem low enough and your saddle setback far enough to balance over the bike with very little or no pressure on your hands (supporting all weight with your spine) that will remove tension in your neck, upper back, and shoulders. When riding your hands should rest very lightly on the bars. They shouldn't be supporting your weight. You shouldn't be leaning onto bars that are too far away. If your headtube is too tall you can buy deep drop bars (150mm FSA Energy). You could even use 175mm drop track bars if it comes to that.
There are many compact road bars with 70mm reach (for example Specialized stock bars, UNO bars). Also you could go with narrower bars. I'm a big guy but love narrow 40cm bars. Narrower also reduces reach. I use 40cm drop bars on my mountain bike and have no problem with that. It's a myth you need wide bars offroad. Wide bars are actually a hazard on tight overgrown trails.
Last edited by Clem von Jones; 09-12-19 at 09:07 AM.