Shout out to my local shop, a TREK corporate store. They popped out the HS cups, got the driveside crankarm off (they had to go buy a tool to do it), and removed the BB from my frame (which was not on the work order) for $25. The mechanic that did the work was not there today, if he had been I'd have bought him lunch. They also have the adapters to put the HS back in (quoted me $15 for that job), so when the frame comes back from paint it will be a worry-free build. Thanks to Andy for helping me realize this was one of those jobs the LBS is there for.