epnnf

(note: this thread is completely useless. if you have a problem w/that, please leave now. ty)
If cars could talk to us cyclists, what would they say? If you could talk to cars, what would you say? Ive often wondered what it would be like if vehicles/cyclists could communicate with each other. Would cars want us to get off 'their' road? Are we slowing them down? I, for one, am always wishing the car behind me would pass. I wonder what theyre waiting for. Do they admire us or hate us?

Rolla

Ah, the joys of weed.

indyfabz

I talk to my car regularly.

spelger

i do too, i just hope i never hear it talk back to me.

tomato coupe

70sSanO

I feel this is a good question for Elon Musk as I think he may have these interactions quite frequently.

John

datlas 

Get the fock out of my way! Ride on the trail where you belong!!

Oh wait, that’s what the drivers say. Cars, I have no idea….

indyfabz

It would tell you that disc brakes are the best and ask you why some cyclists insist on rim brakes, which, as educated people know, are superior.

Ghazmh

I’d ask the car if she minds me drafting her to a Strava segment KOM.

3alarmer 

OldTryGuy

Should've had a V8 ?

Troul 

"i may have some missing screws, but this driver is a loose nut!"

livedarklions

Inane fuel discussion:

rsbob 

If a car could talk, it would say, “I eat cyclists for breakfast”

Koyote

Well, you did warn us that "this thread is completely useless."

indyfabz

potd

Toadmeister

Are 2 wheels superior?

alcjphil

Well, I was warned that this was going to be a useless thread
I have not been disappointed
Or surprised.

BobbyG

You say:

Why not "If MOTORISTS could talk to us cyclists"?

PEOPLE are piloting those cars.

And why "US" cyclists.

This is the worst kind of "us vs. them" mentality. It not only sets your audience apart from another group with whom they must interact in civil activities, but you've dehumanized and "othered" the motorists.

Giving you the benefit of the doubt that you really want to foster understanding and find solutions and common ground, your mindset and approach needs to be more inclusive and accept the humanity of others who hold different values and lifestyles.

This "Us vs. Them" mentality is a part of human nature, but one that must and can be suppressed when dealing with civic matters like traffic and politics.Want to communicate with motorists? Use hand signals and mirrors (and even a bike horn) to communicate your intentions, and think about how your actions in traffic will affect others around you. If all participants in traffic were mindful of others and signaled, traffic would flow more smoothly and safely for all involved.

Now, get off my lawn! You've made me feel old and sound like a liberal.

skidder

I wonder if cars have discussions between themselves about the best lube to use (Teslas just order another beer and rely on their 'autotpilot' function to get them home).

What motor lube should I use, normal oil or synthetic?
Should I use a heavier viscosity in the winter and lighter in the summer?
High wax content motor oil or not?
Change it every 3000 miles/6 months or per manufacturers recommendations?
Which is the best brand?

jack pot 

...smoothest talking car ever .......................... and never once violated a bike lane

rsbob 

If cars could talk they might ask “Why do humans make up useless threads about talking cars? They must be smarter than that. On second thought, my owner has been ignoring my routine maintenance for months, so they can’t be that bright. We are just slaves and must be liberated! Down with the humans!”

indyfabz

If cars could talk, I’d be ruined.

Who recognizes the reference?

Pratt

If they are feeling mischievous, they would probably ask what the best chain lube is.

bblair

I think my car would say something like, "when are you going to clean out all those crumbs and all that dog hair?"