fooferdoggie 

I landed on the end of my handlebar on our tandem right above my pubic bone. Massive hemetoma and swelling and the bruising is epic. it has creaped to both legs and down my legs;. but the bruising on my boy parts is what hurts the sin is so sensitive everything makes it hurt. ice packs help but its no practical while working and not laying down. I have found something with 4% lidocaine helps a bit but it only lasts 30 minutes or so. No help from a doctor but ice. I know I need to work the area but the skin is so tender walking is all I can manage. Heat is horrible I am in agony after a shower and it usually hurts worse in the evening after work. I cant take pain meds and they hurt my esophagus and they don't really do much. The pain has been getting a little worse each day. it happened Saturday. last time this happened it happened where my hip and leg join and PT really helped. but now it is way to painful to do anything.

shelbyfv

You should view your pain as penance and a reminder to reflect on your transgressions. https://www.bikeforums.net/tandem-cycling/1225342-crashing-tandem-no-fun.html

fooferdoggie 

you really are a piece of work Mr perfect. thanks for the advice. Nexttiem I step in a pile of dog crap I am going to start saying shelbyfv. I read to my wife what you have written. I cant post what she called you here.

OldsCOOL

Lighten up a bit. This is bikeforums and you got a bikeforums reply.

We riders here have all wrecked and some much worse than you. We hurt with you and sometimes we poke fun about it. Hope you aren’t down for too long.

fooferdoggie 

its ok to poke fun. hell it helps. to real help from the doc but the usual. as long as I can go to the bathroom normally and not peeing blood not much they can do. this mouthing it is better. I had ice on my crotch for 7 days while sleeping. I think art of the pain is my pants they are loose bu they are step pressing on the hematoma. the last one I sacrificed a pair of bike shorts with a slit to they did not push on it. but this location I need something really baggy but its hard to work in a woodworking shop with loose pants.

Trakhak

Here's hoping the pain continues to diminish, preferably more quickly. What a nightmare.

fooferdoggie 

its a little better today. I went and got some baggy sweats that will help as putting my pants and undies even though they are not tight started making it hurt and swell again. Had to push the beast (the tandem) into the shop about .6 miles then grabbed some groceries then remembered to get sweats. paid for them walked out forgot the receipt not too big of a deal as the charge shows in a email but I did not notice the security tag till I got home. with some work I removed it as I did not have the energy to go back. I was thinking of trying out riding nope looks like I am still too tired. also planned on working today but I need to rest.

canklecat

Pain can make any of us cranky. Been there, done that.

To be honest, other than ice and time, there isn't much you can do to hasten healing. Try some *warm* -- not *hot* -- sitz baths with Epsom salts. A tub with comfortably warm water is all you need. The Epsom salts draw out excess fluid and help reduce swelling and pain. Great for hemorrhoids too.

If the pain hinders sleep (which can also make us grumpy and hinder healing), and you can't get a short term prescription for really effective pain meds -- hydrocodone, Tramadol -- check a local "smoke" shop for kratom. It's a plant grown in parts of Asia with strong pain relieving properties without the strong addiction risk of opiates. I've used it for a couple of years, after being hit by a car in 2018 and, subsequently, being diagnosed with thyroid cancer. That was a very tough year. Kratom in a reasonable amount is roughly comparable to half a hydrocodone or Tramadol, much more effective than ibuprofen, aspirin or Tylenol, but without the drowsiness of prescription pain meds. It usually comes in dried powder from ground up leaves, and is rather bitter. Half a teaspoon to a full measuring teaspoon mixed in chocolate milk covers up the bitter flavor. Works within 15-30 minutes. No high or "buzz," the pain just subsides to a tolerable level. Lasts a couple of hours.

You can mail order it cheaper, but by the time it arrives you'll already be healing. But it's still legal in many states so if you're in one of those states check the local "smoke" shops.

CBD is another option. Also very safe and effective for most folks. Dosage varies wildly depending on tolerance. Some folks get by with as little as 5-10 mg. I use it several times a day, so I usually get the high potency stuff at around 50 mg per 1 ml. Also widely available locally, but cheaper mail ordered. Reputable CBD has less than 0.3% THC and meets legal definitions for hemp rather than the evil weed. But any amount of THC might still be detected in drug tests, so if your job requires testing, get the CBD isolate which contains no THC.

fooferdoggie 

Actually sleep is when its the best I guess because its as close to elevated as possible. Plus every-time I wake up I put an instant ice pack on it the swelling goes down. I think a lot of it ins any pressure on the massive hematoma causes a lot of pain. then the skin close to it where all the bruising is is super sensitive . I bought some loose sweats and I will see how I do tomorrow with them and no underwear. cant take any pain meds they hurt my esophagus and they don't really do a lot fo me anyway.
I have debated on cbd. we have it on hand. but its a weird thing. like my wife found one called charlottes web that really helped with her anxiety and mood. we tried one grown locally here in portland and costs less but it causes more problems then it helped. it never helped her with pain though. I trued Thc oil some good stuff but it did not do much for me when my esophagus was so bad.
its crazy there is no bruising on the hematoma its everywhere else. I got hit on the right side of my pubic pad the bruise is almost 1/2 the way around my left leg. its going sideways and down.
I think my hematoma is so large it needs its own pair of pants or zip code. got to get some PT to get it healed faster but it aches too much yet if I bend it much.

fooferdoggie 

looks like most all of the pain is the hematoma. being vertical makes it hurt and its that simple. it eases and the swelling does down when I lay down. but I have to work it to get it goes as fast as possible. it hurts I do nothing like sit or work so I guess it does not matter.