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i think my gf left because of my simple life

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Old 02-15-06, 02:38 PM
  #101  
Dahon.Steve
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Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
Here's the deal. Rent will always go up, you have to keep paying it, and you're basically paying off the mortgage for your landlord. Or you could find a house that carries for the same as rent, and by the time you're 65, have it paid off.
I agree with everything you said except for the above statement.

In the New York Metro, I would like to find a house that costs about one would pay for rent. Seriously. I doubt you'll find it because I'm looking LIKE CRAZY!

The least expensive home around my way will set you back 330K! The mortgage, taxes and insurance on a home that expensive will be around 2K per month or more! In otherwords, you have to earn about 75K or more to afford that house! You can find rent at about $700.00 dollars per month around my way but one bedrooms will set you back over $900.00.

I would love to buy a home but it looks more like a condo. Heck, even condos five miles from me are asking 400K and the maintenance must be incredible.
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Old 02-15-06, 04:05 PM
  #102  
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Never forget that love is an illusion. The only exception are deep meditators who have deep love and compassion for all people and beings. Love as we know it is just an extension of ego. We love no-one. Our ego doesn't just encompase ourselves but those we know, we have ideas of them built up in our ego's, memories, hopes etc. But it all comes down to the fact that in the end we only love ourselves. Love is nothing but an addiction to the minute sensations that someone produces in you. It's all very mechanical and straight-forward. When you see something your mind cognises this as good or bad. The cognition results in a minute sensation in the body, your mind is affected by these sensations and developes either craving, or aversion. The maddening crazy love is simply an maddening crazy addiction to the sensations that your brain produces in your body when you see this person. You don't really love them, just the sensations that YOUR brain produces. Now I'm not saying that you should never love, just realize that you just love yourself and that this sensation and that cause of it, like all things are impermanent. Nothing external causes us misery, the blame lies 100% within our own minds.

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Old 02-15-06, 06:51 PM
  #103  
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Originally Posted by david.l.k
Never forget that love is an illusion. The only exception are deep meditators who have deep love and compassion for all people and beings. Love as we know it is just an extension of ego. We love no-one. Our ego doesn't just encompase ourselves but those we know, we have ideas of them built up in our ego's, memories, hopes etc. But it all comes down to the fact that in the end we only love ourselves. Love is nothing but an addiction to the minute sensations that someone produces in you. It's all very mechanical and straight-forward. When you see something your mind cognises this as good or bad. The cognition results in a minute sensation in the body, your mind is affected by these sensations and developes either craving, or aversion. The maddening crazy love is simply an maddening crazy addiction to the sensations that your brain produces in your body when you see this person. You don't really love them, just the sensations that YOUR brain produces. Now I'm not saying that you should never love, just realize that you just love yourself and that this sensation and that cause of it, like all things are impermanent. Nothing external causes us misery, the blame lies 100% within our own minds.
Exactly. So many people harbor a dillusion that love is so great and mysterious, when it fact it just a mechanical reaction produced by neurons. As the cliche' goes, ignorance is bliss, and in no situation is this more true than love.
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Old 02-15-06, 10:24 PM
  #104  
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Originally Posted by david.l.k
Never forget that love is an illusion. The only exception are deep meditators who have deep love and compassion for all people and beings. Love as we know it is just an extension of ego. We love no-one. Our ego doesn't just encompase ourselves but those we know, we have ideas of them built up in our ego's, memories, hopes etc. But it all comes down to the fact that in the end we only love ourselves. Love is nothing but an addiction to the minute sensations that someone produces in you. It's all very mechanical and straight-forward. When you see something your mind cognises this as good or bad. The cognition results in a minute sensation in the body, your mind is affected by these sensations and developes either craving, or aversion. The maddening crazy love is simply an maddening crazy addiction to the sensations that your brain produces in your body when you see this person. You don't really love them, just the sensations that YOUR brain produces. Now I'm not saying that you should never love, just realize that you just love yourself and that this sensation and that cause of it, like all things are impermanent. Nothing external causes us misery, the blame lies 100% within our own minds.

*Yawn* The only people who bore me more than pessimists are existentialists. Except for Camus - fine writer, to say the least.

When I shove a nail in my arm, the pain is all in my head, but to say that it's not real, and that it's something to be trivialized is stupid.
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Old 02-15-06, 10:53 PM
  #105  
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Yeah I don't think you can boil it down to neurons. I used to think this way.
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Old 02-15-06, 11:51 PM
  #106  
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I agree that it's only chemicals... but so what? That does not diminish the realness of it one bit.
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Old 02-16-06, 02:41 AM
  #107  
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Originally Posted by david.l.k
Never forget that love is an illusion. The only exception are deep meditators who have deep love and compassion for all people and beings. Love as we know it is just an extension of ego. We love no-one. Our ego doesn't just encompase ourselves but those we know, we have ideas of them built up in our ego's, memories, hopes etc. But it all comes down to the fact that in the end we only love ourselves. Love is nothing but an addiction to the minute sensations that someone produces in you. It's all very mechanical and straight-forward. When you see something your mind cognises this as good or bad. The cognition results in a minute sensation in the body, your mind is affected by these sensations and developes either craving, or aversion. The maddening crazy love is simply an maddening crazy addiction to the sensations that your brain produces in your body when you see this person. You don't really love them, just the sensations that YOUR brain produces. Now I'm not saying that you should never love, just realize that you just love yourself and that this sensation and that cause of it, like all things are impermanent. Nothing external causes us misery, the blame lies 100% within our own minds.
Haha, that's a good one. Never forget that your explanation is based on illusory assumptions. Science can't explain love no more than it can explain revenge, no more than it can explain instinct, no more than it can explain hate, no more than it can explain the existence or non-existence of an immortal soul. The ego and superego are simply make-believe behavioral-psychological-biological models, and many people believe that they actually exist, these inert, make-believe models, because they are accepted and promoted by a bunch of scientists or others who write it in the textbooks which the teachers read to the university students or the children and so on and so forth, and instead of people regarding it as just one opinion of many, it is viewed by many as sacred, unchangeable fact. Science, the new religion. That model of the ego is like a baby's plastic toy, a pitiful attempt to explain something that was always beyond Freud's limited mindset and ideological viewpoints. The unknown remains unknown.

Scientists and technicians attempt to reduce everything around them to cyphers and chemicals and neurons and numbers and formulas and what have you, but the truth is, that is no explanation at all, they can't prove sh*t really, it's all jib jab and guessing games, most of it is simply hypotheses, it doesn't convince me anymore than Star Trek or Babylon 5 convinces me of the existence of alien lifeforms. Sure maybe they are out there- wait maybe I can prove it with this formula and this model of how things are because I think that is how they are- gimme a break. Just because you don't understand it doesn't make it fit your mold -or the mold of the greater scientific community- and I can only think that a small, feeble mind could reduce such a wonderful thing like love to an illusory model based on nonsense, but men will believe what they want to believe.

Last edited by madnomad; 02-16-06 at 02:58 AM.
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Old 02-16-06, 07:33 AM
  #108  
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Originally Posted by iBarna
No. It is interesting though that it is always the home owners who want to convince everyone else that their way is the right, the better, way. I as a renter would just settle with "to each his own", but it seems I won't get it. It needs to be shown that I am wrong in what I'm doing. Strange because I always thought I'm a smart guy.
I'm real sorry you feel that way; I was under the impression that this was a discussion forum, where different opinions and views were discussed.
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Old 02-16-06, 07:39 AM
  #109  
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Originally Posted by Dahon.Steve
I agree with everything you said except for the above statement.

In the New York Metro, I would like to find a house that costs about one would pay for rent. Seriously. I doubt you'll find it because I'm looking LIKE CRAZY!

The least expensive home around my way will set you back 330K! The mortgage, taxes and insurance on a home that expensive will be around 2K per month or more! In otherwords, you have to earn about 75K or more to afford that house! You can find rent at about $700.00 dollars per month around my way but one bedrooms will set you back over $900.00.

I would love to buy a home but it looks more like a condo. Heck, even condos five miles from me are asking 400K and the maintenance must be incredible.
Yeah, house prices in big cities is ridiculous. The divide between the haves and the have-nots really shows. In Toronto, Habitat for Humanity is always busy with their projects, because house and even condo prices are getting beyond the reach of the common person. The problem is, anytime someone organizes and gets an affordable housing project underway, the rich property owners cry bloody murder, like their property values are more important than common people being able to afford a roof over their house.
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Old 02-16-06, 11:25 AM
  #110  
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Originally Posted by AlanK
Exactly. So many people harbor a dillusion that love is so great and mysterious, when it fact it just a mechanical reaction produced by neurons. As the cliche' goes, ignorance is bliss, and in no situation is this more true than love.
ya you know through all this i get the people who are all, "its all in your head its just a chemical reaction". i just want punch them in face... i dont mean anyone here at all, just those people who listen to you, see you cry and then say that. oh and the just get over it people, they can die too.
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Old 02-16-06, 01:55 PM
  #111  
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Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
Yeah, house prices in big cities is ridiculous. The divide between the haves and the have-nots really shows. In Toronto, Habitat for Humanity is always busy with their projects, because house and even condo prices are getting beyond the reach of the common person. The problem is, anytime someone organizes and gets an affordable housing project underway, the rich property owners cry bloody murder, like their property values are more important than common people being able to afford a roof over their house.
Part of the problem stems from the wild real estate speculation that's happend over the past 4 years. We've seen prices of homes double and the MLS guild is now full of homes for sale as people are getting ready to unload. The market is getting soft and we will see what happens as "Luxury" home construction continues at record levels.

Here's the problem with Habitat for Humanity projects. If they build affordable housing, the price of these new homes go waaaay up in a short while making them unafforadble once it's sold. In addition, I find organizations like the NAACP have to sue small towns to get them to build low income housing!

Last edited by Dahon.Steve; 02-17-06 at 09:10 AM.
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Old 02-16-06, 05:07 PM
  #112  
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Originally Posted by madnomad
Haha, that's a good one. Never forget that your explanation is based on illusory assumptions. Science can't explain love no more than it can explain revenge, no more than it can explain instinct, no more than it can explain hate,.
If you study the psychological research, there is solid evidence to explain virtually very element of human emotions and experience. It's not known for certain, but the science is very solid. Life isn't nearly as mysterious as so many people like to think it is. It seems people like you who harbor such ideas do so because some aspects of reality aren't easy or appealing to accept, so you'd rather live dilluded than face reality.

******* coward.

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Post edited, again over the top. Regardless of your beliefs DO NOT ATTACK OTHER MEMBERS.

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Old 02-16-06, 06:00 PM
  #113  
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Re: rent vs own debate.

Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
I'm real sorry you feel that way; I was under the impression that this was a discussion forum, where different opinions and views were discussed.
The thing is that people who spoke up were growing tired of discussing this. This was Roody's original post about. This topic has been discussed over and over again -- and we won't be able to settle it. Nor do we need to. There's nothing more to discuss. I see a person's reasons to own. But I don't want to own a house right now, I am happy to rent. Regurgiating the same old arguments and debates adds nothing to this forum anymore. Everything has been said countless times already.

You own, I rent. Celebrate diversity.
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Old 02-16-06, 07:42 PM
  #114  
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No sh*t!! I've been looking over the #'s with my gf.
$2000/mo? Think again, after taxes, food, car, insurance, utilities, etc, it's more like double that, $4000/mo is what you need, cash.

Originally Posted by Dahon.Steve
I agree with everything you said except for the above statement.

In the New York Metro, I would like to find a house that costs about one would pay for rent. Seriously. I doubt you'll find it because I'm looking LIKE CRAZY!

The least expensive home around my way will set you back 330K! The mortgage, taxes and insurance on a home that expensive will be around 2K per month or more! In otherwords, you have to earn about 75K or more to afford that house! You can find rent at about $700.00 dollars per month around my way but one bedrooms will set you back over $900.00.

I would love to buy a home but it looks more like a condo. Heck, even condos five miles from me are asking 400K and the maintenance must be incredible.
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Old 02-16-06, 07:45 PM
  #115  
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Originally Posted by Eatadonut
Well, then she's nothing like the italian girl I dated.
Yea I know, I got lucky. Her family's like that, I'm not.
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Old 02-16-06, 07:49 PM
  #116  
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Hey,
I was actively single until I was 38 years old. I expected a solo lifestyle until I met my wife. We knew almost instantly that we met the right person. If I tried to make the previous relationship work, I may not be happily married now. You may meet someone at the natural food store tomorrow.

Life is what it is. People grow, change and reinvent themselves. Look at a picture of yourself 10 years ago and you'll see a different person than you are now. Your change is good and so was hers. Someday you'll see what a blessing this was for both of you.

Kurt Vonnegut sold cars (Saab) for godsakes. Thankfully, he didn't try to make that work.
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Old 02-17-06, 02:47 AM
  #117  
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@ Alan K, i think that last bit is totally uncalled for,.. if i was mod i'd ban your a$$ for a week or two. Not cool man.
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Old 02-17-06, 03:28 AM
  #118  
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To the OP-Not every woman, or indeed every man, has delusions that they are living in the Iron Age, as apparently many BikeForums.net members do.
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Old 02-17-06, 08:20 AM
  #119  
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Originally Posted by iBarna
Re: rent vs own debate.



The thing is that people who spoke up were growing tired of discussing this. This was Roody's original post about. This topic has been discussed over and over again -- and we won't be able to settle it.
Typically, in an open, public forum such as this, whenever someone grows tired of discussing a certain topic, they simply cease in discussing said topic; making it unnecessary (and frankly, rather tacky) to announce the fact that they tire of said discussion. As is the case with many discussions, there is no reason to settle anything, because there really isn't anything to settle; it's simply an exchange of different point of views for the purpose of entertainment and, perhaps, a little enlightenment.
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Old 02-17-06, 08:55 AM
  #120  
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Originally Posted by Dahon.Steve
Part of the problem stems from the wild real estate speculation that's happend over the past 4 years. We've seen prices of homes double and the MLS guild is now full of homes for sale as people are getting ready to unload. The market is getting soft and we will see what happens as "Luxury" home construction continues at record levels.

Here's the problem with Habitat for Humanity projects. If they build affordable housing, it has to build by organizations like the NAACP because no builder in their right mind is constructing this type.
There is definitely a problem when too many people think of their houses as investments instead of a home. Unfortunately, this leads to the assumption that all homeowners must be gluttonous and wasteful, and that the act of buying a house would preclude one from expressing artistic talent. It's too bad, really, that people carry these assumptions with them. For some, home ownership has made them less wasteful and more self-reliant; for others, it has allowed them to spread their artistic wings having the freedom to turn their abode into the kind of studio they need.

Really, the only limiting factor in each of our lives is ourselves and our preconceived notions.
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Old 02-17-06, 10:21 AM
  #121  
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Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
Unfortunately, this leads to the assumption that all homeowners must be gluttonous and wasteful, and that the act of buying a house would preclude one from expressing artistic talent. .
Could you please point out any posts here or otherwise that make these assertions? I'd be interested in reading them - particularly the latter, which is so absurd I can't even fathom anyone saying it or why they would, and I want to read their reasoning behind it.
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Old 02-17-06, 11:48 AM
  #122  
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Originally Posted by Alekhine
Could you please point out any posts here or otherwise that make these assertions? I'd be interested in reading them - particularly the latter, which is so absurd I can't even fathom anyone saying it or why they would, and I want to read their reasoning behind it.
Almost as absurd as your own generalizations, eh?
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Old 02-17-06, 12:06 PM
  #123  
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Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
Almost as absurd as your own generalizations, eh?
Typically, in an open, public forum such as this, whenever someone grows tired of discussing a certain topic, they simply cease in discussing said topic; making it unnecessary (and frankly, rather tacky) to announce the fact that they tire of said discussion. As is the case with many discussions, there is no reason to settle anything, because there really isn't anything to settle; it's simply an exchange of different point of views for the purpose of entertainment and, perhaps, a little enlightenment.
Well you've done a good job of hihacking cabana's thread! Then you had to go and deliver a little sermon to make it even more off topic.

Suggestion: Maybe you would like to start a new thread to deal with the issue of renting vs. owning, as that does seem to be a popular topic?

I didn't get the impression that his gf really cared if they rented or owned, so that was not the issue, but it did sound like she wanted shelter apart from her parents.

So, if we could get back to the soap opera, and the quesion of whether a simple carfree life is compatible with a mature relationship. . . .
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Old 02-17-06, 12:19 PM
  #124  
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Originally Posted by Roody
Well you've done a good job of hihacking cabana's thread! Then you had to go and deliver a little sermon to make it even more off topic.
What's that term that describes people who are guilty of something they accuse other people of? Oh, yeah. Hypocrite. I'd tell you how tired I am of your little diatribe, but I wouldn't want to be...you know. I see quite a few other posts that have driven this off-topic, so I'd imagine you're going to be quite busy setting all those people straight too. Have fun!
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Old 02-17-06, 01:04 PM
  #125  
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Originally Posted by DigitalQuirk
Almost as absurd as your own generalizations, eh?
Where are the examples? Not trying to insult you, and I'm not sure what you're talking about as regards me or my generalizations. I'm seriously curious about these artists who are anti-house and people who accuse all home owners of being wasteful gluttons.

If they exist as you purport they do, please show me some examples so I can laugh about them, presumably alongside you - or apparently not.
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