Originally Posted by
indyfabz
I read that book while on tour in 2017. I can picture exactly where I was when I finished it. A must read for sure. Both my parents made choices that hastened their deaths because of poor quality of life. Dad stopped his dialysis rather than suffer from painful cancer that was going to kill him at some point. Mom refused dialysis completely. She had several health problems that were making her miserable.
Hard stuff. I'm glad your parents were able to make those decisions, painful as they must have been.
My dad was put on dialysis past the point where it was remotely appropriate or where he could fully comprehend the contingencies. The conversation boiled down to, "you'll die without it." He, of course, consented. It was nonstop torture for him and sent him deep into an organic depression. When he would refuse to go, we'd ask, "are you okay with dying?" and he'd say, "no," so we'd push him. Ultimately, the blood pressure drop after each session cost him his remaining marbles and one day we finally took him at his word. He had a pretty good 2-weeks and died at home, so we salvaged something. The hospice staff couldn't believe we had allowed him to go on dialysis, but we had the conflict of interest of actually
wanting him to die by that point, so we had to defer to the hyper-aggressive academic fleas providing his care.
Part of the problem, I'm sorry to say, is that dialysis is reimbursed 100% by Medicare, making it a profit center.