billd76

Morning all. Last son, Matt graduated from Penn State on December 17th. He is leaving for California on January 6th. Oldest Son graduated this past June and is living in Portland Oregon. January 6th will be a tough day. He is driving to cali with his Husky Spartacus. Sigh, I'm having a hard time letting go!! Both son's spent five years in the Marine Corps prior to college, and both feel in love with the west coast. Both graduated college with high honors! Dam super proud of both of them! I just don't know what it will be like this summer with neither of them home. I know some you had to deal with this, how did you cope? How did you put up with your spouse? I can imagine getting a lot more miles on the bike this summer, playing more guitar, maybe getting back into RC flying. See, there, I feel better already . It's just going to be tough for a few months.

10 Wheels

m o r e m i l e s

GlennR

My daughter has been out of the house for 7 years and my son has been out for 4.

I wish both would move back... I miss having them around all the time.

As far as more miles... he's dragged my ass across many a climb.

Steve B.

A good song on the subject;

BlazingPedals

My eldest son lives in Albany OR. Oregon looks like a great place to live, so when will you be moving out there to be closer to both of them?

billd76

wow great song!

billd76

Yeah when we went out for the oldest son's graduation, we found Portland to be great. But from what I've been reading about "empty nest syndrome" We shouldn't move closer to them. We are actually thinking about trying Belize out

rumrunn6

good luck billd76. Wifey & are have been experimenting with some mild empty nesting as our 2 kids wind their way thru college. we miss them when they leave but then get used to our freedoms while they are away & have to adjust to them returning home for holidays & the summer. ideally they will live in the next town over. far enough that we don't have to clean up after them or shop for them but close enough that we can see them once a week or so & give them a hug. going to a wake tonight for daughter's friend's 22 yr old sister that died in a fiery crash Christmas eve. I can not imagine the pain & anguish that family is being tortured with. you have so much to be thankful for & proud of. here's hoping they move closer to you guys at some point, or maybe you guys move out west! how about that idea!?

trailangel

It's California, not "Cali"
It's San Fransisco, not "Frisco"
We have our rules here!

Happy New Year!

billd76

Rule is "Cali"fornia!!!?? Say it aint so!!!

billd76

Very sad!! I know we have been blessed beyond reproach. Prayers for the family

OldTryGuy

We raised our kids to go out into the world and do their thing. Daughter went away for college and no tears shed. Son signed up early for Army and no tears were shed. We accomplished our jobs and they had their lives to live.

Daughter wound up moving from S.C. back to FL because SIL's job required it. They are now 3 hours away, very well settled with 4 kids and just a 3 hour drive away.

Son is still in the Army in El Paso and grandma will be heading out next month for a weekend visit. New job will be keeping him in longer and he's fine with that.

RonH

What's tough is when they call asking for money.

Have fun on the bike.

BlazingPedals

I'm resisting the urge. There's no guarantee my eldest will stay there and I'd hate to go chasing him all over the country when he transfers around. The younger one is right here, but he hasn't given me any grandkids yet.

Steve B.

Croton Aqueduct and dam ?

B. Carfree

Don't be surprised if your eldest doesn't join you there. Sometimes it seems like half the transplants into Oregon that I knew eventually ended up in Belize.

If not, you've got a couple of great incentives for some nice bike tours. Ride across the country to PDX, and then head south to visit the newest Californian, assuming you merely misspoke with that Cali stuff (Cali is a quite a ways south down in Columbia)

GlennR

Yes.

revchuck 

I actually have that album from back in college (early 70s).

My daughter and her family fell on hard times, so they're living with me until they get their feet under them again. It's a strain financially, but it's kinda nice having them around.

Barrettscv 

We encouraged our children to live abroad and see the world. Our youngest is getting a Masters of Computer Science in Amsterdam and one of our daughters graduated from the University of Milan earlier this year. She now lives in Belgium. The Oldest child has been living in Italy and Spain and now calls Barcelona home.

My wife will consider retirement in southern Europe, especially if our children remain overseas.

GlennR

My son after getting his undergrad degree in history and education, went to Israel for year to teach and travel. When he returned he got his masters in autism and intellectual disabilities. He's not working as a special ed teacher.

TomWinKC

Thank you to you and your son. I have a son with special needs and greatly appreciate your son's dedication and avocation.

Daspydyr 

Life crawls away on you, doesn't it. But it sounds like you raised a couple of sharp, hard working young adventurers. If you had raised couch potatoes who wanted to live in your basement....... well....


This is a tribute to you and the responsible parent you were. Congratulations.

CrankyOne

We've been empty for eight years. Kids live 2,000 miles away. We miss them and really enjoy getting together with them as often as possible. OTOH, we keep quite busy which helps. We're semi-retired which means we still work but very reduced hours. We're both involved in a lot of volunteer stuff like promoting protected bicycling and walking infrastructure and working with disadvantaged folks.

Most of all we enjoy each other and spending time together and with friends.

70sSanO

We live in Southern California and both of our twin boys have ended up in Arizona. I am really close to them as we have shared a lot if sports together, especially years of surfing. Our daughter and her husband are close by. Last October both my wife and I retired.

As for coping, yeah, we miss the kids, but we are still both very active and have been blessed with good (enough) health and good year-round weather. Our relationship has only improved as we refer to ourselves as re-newlyweds and not empty nesters.

One thing to remember is that as kids become adults and have all the same responsibilities to spouses, family, houses, and jobs as we have, they don't have the same amount of freedom as they did growing up. No different than when I got a job, left home, got married etc.

John

John E

When our elder son moved out, I took over his room as a much-needed home office. When our younger son moved out, I took over his room as the guest room we never had, and it is now a nursery for our 21-month-old grandson's visits. Our elder son and his wife have great local careers, and they bought a house within 5 miles of ours, so we see them and the little guy pretty often. Our younger son is in a DPT program at a local private college, so we see him fairly often, as well, although we do not know where he and his future wife will ultimately end up. At this point I am glad we have not had to deal with the relatively long separation distances some of you have mentioned, and that many of our friends have experienced.