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3alarmer 09-07-14 08:24 PM

....he's a very baaaaaaaaaaaaahd dude.

dynodonn 09-07-14 08:49 PM

Has been told many times to get the flock out of Dodge.

skijor 09-07-14 09:28 PM

Can play the Gunsmoke theme song with his armpit.

Jseis 09-07-14 10:26 PM

His one pit solo of Flight of the Bumblebee draws looks of incredulity.

dynodonn 09-07-14 10:33 PM

After being a judge at the local chili cook off, was able to flatulate the entire Bonanza theme to the amazed and stunned crowd.

3alarmer 09-07-14 11:46 PM

...has stunned a few crowds in elevators in his lifetime.

skijor 09-08-14 06:09 AM

Taped two iPhone 3's together and sold them on ebay to pcad.

MillCreek 09-08-14 10:00 AM

Has decided to work towards his life-long dream of becoming a financial auditor.

ahsposo 09-08-14 10:04 AM

Woke from his life-long dream with a racing heart and in a cold sweat.

"It was awful!" he told Beautiful Dreamer Nightly magazine in an exclusive interview. "I dreamed I had to make a living as a Risk Manager!"

MillCreek 09-08-14 01:39 PM

His attempts to manage the risk caused several small children and a turtle to burst into flame.

Wilfred Laurier 09-08-14 02:19 PM

he coined the phrase
i like turtles

ahsposo 09-08-14 04:31 PM

After accidentally disturbing the massive dust bunny under his end table he engaged in a protracted round of what he later termed 'quantitative sneezing' that failed to stimulate his local economy. On the upside, however, he did see an up tick in booger productivity during that period.

trsidn 09-08-14 04:55 PM

likes turtles

ahsposo 09-08-14 05:41 PM

Plays the game 'Shy Turtle' when he's bored and all alone.

e.g. most of the day.

MillCreek 09-08-14 09:35 PM

Explains to everyone he meets that it is the 'cold that makes it shrink like a frightened turtle'.

Jseis 09-09-14 09:40 AM

The tribal version of the ice bucket challenge is an initiation rite into the feared Frightened Turtle Clan.

ahsposo 09-09-14 09:52 AM

Wishes he had the strength to make shy turtles do what has to be done.

3alarmer 09-09-14 10:16 AM

...he has turned out a few turtles who claimed to be shy. Once the lights go out, they just go wild, and all that shyness disappears.

trsidn 09-09-14 11:08 AM

Was the inspiration for the 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles'.

ahsposo 09-09-14 06:25 PM

Is committed to, and has taken a leadership position in, the "Let's Actually Understand Great Hurt" Action Group with the aim of ridding the post a lie about the above poster thread of all booger, constipation, self pleasuring, incontinence, personal odor (funny smells), same sex or blurred sex, speling and grammer, credit worthiness, job title and 'handed-ness' references out of play in the thread on pain of banishment.

Jseis 09-09-14 09:29 PM

Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2
Is a well known booger free non pleasuring straight shooting opposite sex ambidextrous Class AAA bond rate Nobel Prize winning spelunker who passes unfunny gasses.

Wilfred Laurier 09-09-14 10:47 PM

the last time his little sister janige was over to visit
he wound up with gum in his hair

his sisters name is janice
not janige
sometimes i type 'g' when i mean to type 'c'

Jseis 09-10-14 05:20 AM

Post a Lie about the poster above - Volume 2
Is socially adequate.

ahsposo 09-10-14 06:30 AM

Has an abusive personality, and he takes it out on himself.

MillCreek 09-10-14 09:21 AM

Is pleased to see that the new suggested direction of the thread does not exclude turtles. He is all about turtle inclusiveness.

skijor 09-10-14 12:39 PM

Politely pays for Canadian bacon-topped pizza with [all] Canadian coins.

trsidn 09-10-14 12:51 PM

Calls it 'ham' in the privacy of his own home...

DBA 09-10-14 12:58 PM

spam is what keeps him alive.

Wilfred Laurier 09-10-14 01:57 PM

receiving spam emails makes him believe
that somebody
is thinking about him

Jseis 09-10-14 02:59 PM

The aroma of spam grilling makes him one excited turtle.

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