ScottCommutes

I'll share a couple recent ones:

One of the spare tubes I carry to work every day turned out to be a 20" tube for my son's bike
I tried to save three seconds cutting around some traffic by riding on the sidewalk - crashed into a bush
Going out for rides and realizing that I forgot my helmet or hi-viz vest at home
Not turning on the lights
Driving a car accidentally taking a turn I only take on my bike
And my favorite - getting my chain all nice and cleaned before deciding to check it for wear and throwing it out.

Rick_D

Last weekend on a ride while bunny-hopping some debris I unclipped one shoe. As I smashed the wedding tackle on the seat the pedal swung into my leg, gashing it open. That was a terrible, not good ride home and the crunchy blood-encrusted sock was the least-worst part after it was over.

-The end

CAT7RDR

Early on, arriving at my car after a long ride on a MUP, I forgot to clip out of my pedals.
Did the ole timber onto the asphalt.

Did it one other time after climbing a tough hill and while taking in the view, managed to timber again when lost in the moment.

base2 

While Zwifting in front of a large television I was doing a wicked descent down a large mountain...When the virtual road made a sharp turn I shifted my weight and leaned hard just like real life. I just about flipped over the trainer, the bike, and my clipped in self.

It's a good thing the only evidence was a curious dog that wandered in from the other room to see what the commotion was about.

gecho

I use my Trek touring bike a lot, when I switch to my road bike I'll instinctively reach for bar end shifters even though that bike has STIs. It can happen on my flat bar bikes too as I have a mix of thumb, trigger and grip shifters. Happens more when I'm tired.

roadcrankr

Used some Goof Off to remove some gluey residue from my fork.
It worked so well, it took off a fair bit of paint. Made me worse than a brain fart.

CrimsonEclipse

You bike has a sexually transmitted infection?

veganbikes

This is a bike forum so they are referring to Shimano Total Integration which is there version of the dual control lever meaning your shifter and brakes are integrated in one unit which some people call the silly name of "brifters".

spclark 

Bought a 185mm 10x1.0 solid CM axle a week ago so I can set my MB up to fit the new Wahoo SNAP I bought last month.

As-is it's too long so I took some measurements, cut off 15mm, changed out original QR hollow axle for the solid one.

Turns out I measured wrong... now it's ~ 5mm too short to accept the lock nuts I want to use.

So I've ordered two more axles....

SpedFast

It should probably not go on any group rides for a while.... Just saying.

SpedFast

I had a lot on my mind one day (hey, I'm old) and I put a foldable tire on inside out. Worse yet, I rode it about 10 miles before I realized what I'd done.

indyfabz

Clicking on this thread.

Steve B.

I had the forethought to check for derailer battery power in my AXS bike this morning, it’s said “critical” or some such so I stuck the battery in the charger and rode the backup bike.

urbanknight

Installed a new chain but didn't feed it through the back of the cage plate. Took me longer than it should to figure out why the new chain was making so much noise, and then to decide if I should take the pulley off or break the chain.

rsbob 

Drove the bike 20 miles to a group ride and forgot the cycling shoes. Argh, missed the ride.

Have ridden one 90* turn about 100 times over the last 10 years and a few weeks ago, completely spaced out on bike placement/leaning and totally blew the corner and ended up just about going off the road on the opposite side. It was a total brain fart and has kept me on guard ever since.

Descended a curved hill today at 28- 39 MPH and managed to stay on the road the whole time - so life was good.

Jughed

After riding disc brakes for the past 4 years, I picked up a classic bike with rim brakes.

20 miles into the ride and *****ing the entire time about how bad the rim brakes sucked, damm bike wouldn't stop worth a darn...

Both QR's on the brakes were opened.

noimagination

Not recent, but it's a good one.

Doing maintenance on my bike, replacing cables, bar tape, brake pads, chain, cleaning, etc. Managed to route my front shifter cable over the cable for my (wired, obviously) bike computer. A number of rides later, and the shifter cable had sawed through the bike computer cable.
Wait, it gets better.
In the interim, I had dropped my bike off at the LBS for something or other, I don't remember what. It had nothing to do with cables or the computer.
After I got it back, that's when I noticed the computer cable was sliced through. So, of course, I tried to blame it on the bike shop. They're a good shop, and denied that they had broken the cable. It was only after looking at the cable closely that I could see the road grime in parts of the slice through the cable, so I could verify for myself that this issue pre-dated the bike's trip to the LBS. So, of course, I had to visit the LBS and apologize.

I've had embarrassing trips to my LBS before (and since), for them to fix things I'd hamfistedly messed up, but this has been by far the most embarrassing.

RB1-luvr

while switching tires on a bike I put one of the old ones back on instead of the intended new one. Duh.

Reflector Guy

More than once, I've reached down for my water bottle only to find it isn't there. Of course, it's safely back at home sitting on the kitchen counter.

LarrySellerz

I wouldn’t categorize this as a brain fart. Going from the street to the sidewalk and back is a learned skill and not trivial, especially if you have to hop the curb. Id say it’s an expected part of the learning curve.

i bet it was funny to watch though.. provided you weren’t injured

nathand

I'm currently sitting under a highway overpass, waiting for a rainstorm to end. Got a little too excited to go for a ride after spending a rainy weekend setting up a bike the way I want it. Weather looked promising when I left the house.

Rick_D

Judges would also accept "learning curb." :-)

rosefarts

Not lately. Nearly 30 years ago I think.

I was at the bike shop that I hung out at and occasionally worked at messing with my bike. I loaded my bike into my truck to go for a ride on a trail system about an hour away. I got there and there was no front wheel.

Turns out that I’d backed straight over it in the parking lot and driven off. By straight over, I mean I straddled it and never touched it. Not a scratch. This was confirmed by the guys at the shop who saw me do it but didn’t have time to run out and stop me.

I probably couldn’t do that twice on purpose without crushing a wheel.

If memory serves, it was either a Nuke Proof or White hub, with Ti-Dye spokes, and Mavic 517 rim. It was waiting safely in the shop when I got back.

Rick_D

Whew, what a relief!

Hauled my bike to Napa on a visit to the inlaws. Set up for a nice long ride away from the inlaws and discovered I had left my shoes at home.

An hour later I had a new pair of shoes and cleats from Napa's sole, at the time, bike shop. Expen$ive lesson but at least I got my ride on. And two pairs of shoes to choose from, afterward.

Troul 

& people wonder why slang words like brifters come about....