Problem letting go
#1
Senior Member
Thread Starter
Problem letting go
Started this weekend emptying out my workshop. Plan was to set aside things worth selling or passing on to someone that can appreciate the old stuff. I threw stuff out, old catalogs and such. Then a day late went to the trash and pulled most of it out of there.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
#2
Senior Member
It's a real struggle. I wish I had any form of answer, but my garage, shed, bike room, and hobby room upstairs all tell the same tale as you've outlined in your post.
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#3
Bikes are okay, I guess.
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Viking funeral. Burn everything. That's what they'll do with all my stuff.
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#4
Senior Member
That's a tough one, Habanero. I'm 67 and have bins in the basement and the garage of things I think I might need.
I'm not a hoarder! But I have way too much junk in my life. Yes, it's all neatly stowed in bins. But also... Yes, it's too much and has got to go.
I have started to work on it. I donated and discarded several carloads and trash pickups of stuff from my garage, including 2 bikes I had planned to fix up, a bunch of computers, and lots of VHS tapes, among other stuff that was just plain trash if I'm being honest.
I still have a ways to go, with bins containing old Campy and Shimano parts going back to the mid 1980s. In the basement, bins of clothes, and bins that hold the contents of various junk drawers I've had overflowing at previous residences.
The "demon" that visits me once in a great while and urges me to not get rid of stuff is this:
.
Anyway, good luck with it. I'm still working on mine, so I don't leave behind a truckload of stuff for my wife or son to get rid of.
.
I'm not a hoarder! But I have way too much junk in my life. Yes, it's all neatly stowed in bins. But also... Yes, it's too much and has got to go.
I have started to work on it. I donated and discarded several carloads and trash pickups of stuff from my garage, including 2 bikes I had planned to fix up, a bunch of computers, and lots of VHS tapes, among other stuff that was just plain trash if I'm being honest.
I still have a ways to go, with bins containing old Campy and Shimano parts going back to the mid 1980s. In the basement, bins of clothes, and bins that hold the contents of various junk drawers I've had overflowing at previous residences.
The "demon" that visits me once in a great while and urges me to not get rid of stuff is this:
.
1. I suddenly and unexpectedly need a small item I've carried in my universe of stuff for decades. This happened last year when my son bought a used zither and needed a zither tuning wrench. Well I just happened to have one my sister bought in the 1960s, and I knew right where it was.
.2. I'll throw away some mechanical part or device I've been keeping for years or even decades. Within a week or so, I'll finally have a legitimate need for the discarded part or device.
.Anyway, good luck with it. I'm still working on mine, so I don't leave behind a truckload of stuff for my wife or son to get rid of.
.
Last edited by SPlKE; 02-06-23 at 06:02 PM.
#5
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Ya never know the real value but ask my wife. She will tell ya its all trash. Better still would be posting a story of how you finally used that item hidden in your garage after so many years. Here's one...
Had to stabilize with four points a heavy crate at least 1" above a slab. Told my boys to go to the garage corner and dig out the four disk brake disks from our 1978 Mercury Grand Marquis station wagon. We put them on the corners of the crate and they worked perfectly. My Boys said... Dam Dad!
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
Had to stabilize with four points a heavy crate at least 1" above a slab. Told my boys to go to the garage corner and dig out the four disk brake disks from our 1978 Mercury Grand Marquis station wagon. We put them on the corners of the crate and they worked perfectly. My Boys said... Dam Dad!
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
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No matter where you're at... There you are... Δf:=f(1/2)-f(-1/2)
#6
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There is another thread "Reluctantly Selling..." At one point I had over 50 bikes, had about the most complete collection of Bianchi race bikes, pre-war though the early 80s. Over time I decided I didn't want the number of bikes and support parts hanging around. I shifted my point of view from adoration to this stuff is holding me back, so in other words, I found that I could literally "care less". It did the trick, sold all but 5 bikes, sold all the cool collectable Bianchi bikes. I also figured that I was a care taker of these objects not really the forever owner.
Hope you can figure out a helpful mind shift for yourself.
Guy
Hope you can figure out a helpful mind shift for yourself.
Guy
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#7
Senior Member
Ya never know the real value but ask my wife. She will tell ya its all trash. Better still would be posting a story of how you finally used that item hidden in your garage after so many years. Here's one...
Had to stabilize with four points a heavy crate at least 1" above a slab. Told my boys to go to the garage corner and dig out the four disk brake disks from our 1978 Mercury Grand Marquis station wagon. We put them on the corners of the crate and they worked perfectly. My Boys said... Dam Dad!
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
Had to stabilize with four points a heavy crate at least 1" above a slab. Told my boys to go to the garage corner and dig out the four disk brake disks from our 1978 Mercury Grand Marquis station wagon. We put them on the corners of the crate and they worked perfectly. My Boys said... Dam Dad!
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
He mentioned that he needed a zither tuning wrench. About 10 minutes later, I texted him a picture of one I had in hand.
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#8
Senior Member
Started this weekend emptying out my workshop. Plan was to set aside things worth selling or passing on to someone that can appreciate the old stuff. I threw stuff out, old catalogs and such. Then a day late went to the trash and pulled most of it out of there.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
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#10
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My question is what would you use the extra space for...?
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1987 Crest Cannondale, 1987 Basso Gap, 1992 Rossin Performance EL, 1990ish Van Tuyl, 1985 Trek 670, 2003 Pinarello Surprise, 1990ish MBK Atlantique, 1987 Peugeot Competition, 1987 Nishiki Tri-A, 1981 Faggin, 1996 Cannondale M500, 1984 Mercian, 1982 AD SuperLeicht, 1985 Massi (model unknown), 1988 Daccordi Griffe , 1989 Fauxsin MTB, 1981 Ciocc Mockba, 1992 Bianchi Giro, 1977 Colnago Super, 1971 Raleigh International, 1998 Corratec Ap & Dun, 1991 Peugeot Slimestone
#11
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TiHabs,
I am at the same point in life. I have two complete workshops, one for golf club repairs and one for bikes. The tools are well over $100k with the workbenches and specialty items. In many ways I am just a caretaker of the bikes and the tools as they will last way longer than me. It is going to be a struggle to walk away from it all, but I am starting. I have a thirty year collection of Campy vintage parts and have sent along many of the 1960 era parts boxes to vintage enthusiasts. I doubt I will need the six bikes I have now when riding becomes impossible. I am hoping to find a way to pick the favorite and keep it, and let all of the others go. It is a hard thing to do. Smiles, MH
I am at the same point in life. I have two complete workshops, one for golf club repairs and one for bikes. The tools are well over $100k with the workbenches and specialty items. In many ways I am just a caretaker of the bikes and the tools as they will last way longer than me. It is going to be a struggle to walk away from it all, but I am starting. I have a thirty year collection of Campy vintage parts and have sent along many of the 1960 era parts boxes to vintage enthusiasts. I doubt I will need the six bikes I have now when riding becomes impossible. I am hoping to find a way to pick the favorite and keep it, and let all of the others go. It is a hard thing to do. Smiles, MH
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#12
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The bike bits are reasonably well under control , but the books are taking over ahhhhh!
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#13
Me duelen las nalgas
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Yeah, I was there about 10 years ago. I was only in my mid-50s, but after a car wreck in 2001 (full size SUV blew a light at highway speed and t-boned my compact car) busted up my back and neck I'd been hobbling around on a cane for years if I needed to walk more than 100 yards or so. I had severe asthma and bouts with pneumonia and bronchitis almost every winter. I figured I'd never be able to use some of my hobbyist stuff again so I sold or gave away pretty much everything to family and friends. That included my 1976 Motobecane, tools, Detto Pietro cleated shoes, that weird old Wonder light with proprietary battery.
But in 2015 I decided to try riding a bike again. Got a heavy upright comfort hybrid. I was still so stiff I could hardly lean forward the little amount to reach the handlebar. I had to stop every 400 yards just to catch my breath and huff my asthma inhaler. But after a year I was riding 20-30 mile casual rides. I upgraded to a lighter, sportier hybrid. Then in 2017, an old school steel road bike, my Ironman. My conditioning improved dramatically.
Then in 2018 I was hit by a car, setting me back almost to where I was in 2001. The same year, coincidentally, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Most of 2018 was a daze of health setbacks, clinging to some semblance of fitness, and trying to avoid putting on a ton of weight.
But I was determined to retain and recover my fitness. In 2018 I bought my first carbon fiber bike, an early 1990s Trek OCLV. In 2020, a friend gave me a 2010 or so carbon fiber racing frame with crankset but nothing else. I built that up and started chasing KOMs. Never got one but snagged a few top tens. Ten years earlier that would have been inconceivable.
In late 2021 I caught COVID despite being fully vaxxed. No hospitalization, not even ER. But despite a couple of rounds of Prednisone, recovery took nearly a full year. I realized what others were talking about with long-haul COVID symptoms, with persistent fatigue, chronic pain, etc. Chronic neck pain from being hit by cars twice was limiting my bike rides to an hour, maybe 90 minutes tops before I needed to stretch, rest and recover. First I quit all fast group rides. That I had to quit even casual group rides.
Lingering vertigo was the worst. That kept me off the bike most of 2022. My cycling mileage dropped from 5,000 miles a year to 500. But I switched to jogging to maintain aerobic fitness and leg strength. I used an indoor trainer too but I preferred to get outside as often as possible.
I was on the verge of selling almost all of my bike stuff, keeping maybe one bike mostly for the indoor trainer, a few basic tools, spares and components. Currently I have six bikes cluttering up my spare bedroom, along with boxes of components, tools, etc. And I haven't ridden some of them in at least three years.
But a few months ago I started feeling better. My running times are improving. I ran a solo half marathon to close out 2022. I haven't quite regained my enthusiasm for cycling, but that's due in part to a sharp increase in neighborhood violence and overtly hostile drivers. Like many US cities, things went to hell during the pandemic and haven't returned to normal yet. It's easier to dodge the crazies on foot.
So I'm still on the fence about what to keep or sell of my glut of bikes. I plan to weed it down to two bikes and the minimum spares, parts and tools.
But I also remember regretting getting rid of some stuff in 2014 when I was feeling pessimistic about ever recovering from the first car wreck. I think I'm keeping some of the bike stuff as motivation to get back on the bike. I can do that with fewer bikes and less clutter.
I don't really have much emotional or nostalgic connection with the bikes and bike stuff. They're just tokens of what I've been able to do in the past and hope to do again.
But in 2015 I decided to try riding a bike again. Got a heavy upright comfort hybrid. I was still so stiff I could hardly lean forward the little amount to reach the handlebar. I had to stop every 400 yards just to catch my breath and huff my asthma inhaler. But after a year I was riding 20-30 mile casual rides. I upgraded to a lighter, sportier hybrid. Then in 2017, an old school steel road bike, my Ironman. My conditioning improved dramatically.
Then in 2018 I was hit by a car, setting me back almost to where I was in 2001. The same year, coincidentally, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Most of 2018 was a daze of health setbacks, clinging to some semblance of fitness, and trying to avoid putting on a ton of weight.
But I was determined to retain and recover my fitness. In 2018 I bought my first carbon fiber bike, an early 1990s Trek OCLV. In 2020, a friend gave me a 2010 or so carbon fiber racing frame with crankset but nothing else. I built that up and started chasing KOMs. Never got one but snagged a few top tens. Ten years earlier that would have been inconceivable.
In late 2021 I caught COVID despite being fully vaxxed. No hospitalization, not even ER. But despite a couple of rounds of Prednisone, recovery took nearly a full year. I realized what others were talking about with long-haul COVID symptoms, with persistent fatigue, chronic pain, etc. Chronic neck pain from being hit by cars twice was limiting my bike rides to an hour, maybe 90 minutes tops before I needed to stretch, rest and recover. First I quit all fast group rides. That I had to quit even casual group rides.
Lingering vertigo was the worst. That kept me off the bike most of 2022. My cycling mileage dropped from 5,000 miles a year to 500. But I switched to jogging to maintain aerobic fitness and leg strength. I used an indoor trainer too but I preferred to get outside as often as possible.
I was on the verge of selling almost all of my bike stuff, keeping maybe one bike mostly for the indoor trainer, a few basic tools, spares and components. Currently I have six bikes cluttering up my spare bedroom, along with boxes of components, tools, etc. And I haven't ridden some of them in at least three years.
But a few months ago I started feeling better. My running times are improving. I ran a solo half marathon to close out 2022. I haven't quite regained my enthusiasm for cycling, but that's due in part to a sharp increase in neighborhood violence and overtly hostile drivers. Like many US cities, things went to hell during the pandemic and haven't returned to normal yet. It's easier to dodge the crazies on foot.
So I'm still on the fence about what to keep or sell of my glut of bikes. I plan to weed it down to two bikes and the minimum spares, parts and tools.
But I also remember regretting getting rid of some stuff in 2014 when I was feeling pessimistic about ever recovering from the first car wreck. I think I'm keeping some of the bike stuff as motivation to get back on the bike. I can do that with fewer bikes and less clutter.
I don't really have much emotional or nostalgic connection with the bikes and bike stuff. They're just tokens of what I've been able to do in the past and hope to do again.
#14
feros ferio
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Have you ever considered the benefits of illiteracy?
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Capo: 1959 Modell Campagnolo, S/N 40324; 1960 Sieger (2), S/N 42624, 42597
Carlton: 1962 Franco Suisse, S/N K7911
Peugeot: 1970 UO-8, S/N 0010468
Bianchi: 1982 Campione d'Italia, S/N 1.M9914
Schwinn: 1988 Project KOM-10, S/N F804069
"Far and away the best prize that life offers is the chance to work hard at work worth doing." --Theodore Roosevelt
Capo: 1959 Modell Campagnolo, S/N 40324; 1960 Sieger (2), S/N 42624, 42597
Carlton: 1962 Franco Suisse, S/N K7911
Peugeot: 1970 UO-8, S/N 0010468
Bianchi: 1982 Campione d'Italia, S/N 1.M9914
Schwinn: 1988 Project KOM-10, S/N F804069
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#16
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I can only offer a sympathetic ear. I’m in the same boat— too many hobbies and excessive quantities of each. It really is debilitating.
One approach I’ve been trying with some success of late to overcome my executive dysfunction: take one thing and evaluate what it would take to replace it if ever desired. The act of quantifying and visualizing that there’s a tangible path back, often helps me let go. Rinse and repeat.
If all else fails, we’ll all still be here to listen and commiserate.
One approach I’ve been trying with some success of late to overcome my executive dysfunction: take one thing and evaluate what it would take to replace it if ever desired. The act of quantifying and visualizing that there’s a tangible path back, often helps me let go. Rinse and repeat.
If all else fails, we’ll all still be here to listen and commiserate.
#17
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Ya never know the real value but ask my wife. She will tell ya its all trash. Better still would be posting a story of how you finally used that item hidden in your garage after so many years.
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
Here is another one. Am I ever going to use that Ammo Can with desiccated Wright's Stain, Giemsa Stain, or my desiccated Gram Stain set. Hopefully not... But am I going to throw them away...?
For my retirement, I told my wife I wanted a set of nice garage cabinets to replace all the mismatched wire shelving and homemade workbenches. I had to move everything out of my workshop area to put the new cabinets in, which gave me a reason to sort through the years of accumulated junk. The cabinets are now installed and I am working through the pile so we can get the car back in the garage. I'm another one that holds on to all the miscellaneous bits of hardware that might come in handy some day. I sent an extra bag of trash out for last week's pickup, and hopefully I'll have another one this week.
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#18
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...One approach I’ve been trying with some success of late to overcome my executive dysfunction: take one thing and evaluate what it would take to replace it if ever desired. The act of quantifying and visualizing that there’s a tangible path back, often helps me let go. Rinse and repeat...
Brent
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"I have a tendency to meander sometimes." B.G.
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#19
Full Member
I get the joke and the sentiment. I'm as guilty as anyone else here collected bike stuff that almost no one else cares about (except you my fellow BF nuts). But I'd have to say what a waste that would be, and hope that people don't take your comment literally. Give away before you throw it away.
#20
Full Member
Started this weekend emptying out my workshop. Plan was to set aside things worth selling or passing on to someone that can appreciate the old stuff. I threw stuff out, old catalogs and such. Then a day late went to the trash and pulled most of it out of there.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
Honestly, I never thought in a thousand years I would be that guy, the hoarder guy who dies with a workshop stuffed full of old junk that ends up in a landfill the day after he dies. Seriously, this is a problem for me and I really don't know how to deal with it. I do not want people to rummage through my old stuff or have my kids or wife have to deal with it, but I am really struggling with letting it go.
How does one overcome the emotional attachment? How does one overcome the thought that "I may have a use for that sometime" or "remember when you needed a part and could not find one anywhere?" Sounds really stupid, but it is very real and tough to let go.
I rescued a mid-80's Schwinn Super Sport from a dumpster recently. Felt a bit stupid about it because I have better bikes and dont need another project. But I just couldn't stand to see it go to waste, nice Columbus tubing, etc. On a whim I offered it to two guys that lust after modern high end road bikes. Surprised to see that had secretly caught the vintage bug from me and really wanted an old bike project. Didn't take a week for one of them to build into a nice fixie.
So pass it on and enjoy the rewards of gifting.
#21
Senior Member
Local bike co-ops are great way to pay it forward. They love bike parts. I always feel good dropping stuff off at those p[lkaces.
In Baltimore we have Velocipede. Velocipede Bike Project
In Baltimore we have Velocipede. Velocipede Bike Project
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#22
Disco Infiltrator
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“It’s still good, I might need it, it’s not worthless” is a lock. The key is: when? When are you ever going to use it or sell it? Actuarial… you have n years left. You can’t take it with you.
And you know how yard sales go. People will paw through it, only one guy will want it and because he wants it you won’t like him.
if you aren’t already selling stuff on eBay you aren’t going to start now. Think of all the boxes and mailing and stuff. Think of that beautiful doodad selling for pennies and you are just eating ten or twenty bucks to ship it.
There’s probably a Buy Nothing group for your area on Facebook. Do a box a week, maybe. If they don’t want it, free on Craigslist. THAT is easy. If it’s still too hard you are going to never do it.
And you know how yard sales go. People will paw through it, only one guy will want it and because he wants it you won’t like him.
if you aren’t already selling stuff on eBay you aren’t going to start now. Think of all the boxes and mailing and stuff. Think of that beautiful doodad selling for pennies and you are just eating ten or twenty bucks to ship it.
There’s probably a Buy Nothing group for your area on Facebook. Do a box a week, maybe. If they don’t want it, free on Craigslist. THAT is easy. If it’s still too hard you are going to never do it.
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#23
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There is lots more of this stuff out there. It is safe to let most of it go. After you're done, relax and enjoy the uncluttered space.
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#24
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Cold dead hands, that being said whatever I do or don't do before I go won't matter.
My kid will be advised to do whatever he wants with the hoard, collection, pile, mess, etc.
Scrap, sift, keep, donate, give away, walk away, whatever or not.
My kid will be advised to do whatever he wants with the hoard, collection, pile, mess, etc.
Scrap, sift, keep, donate, give away, walk away, whatever or not.
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